#1 humor site on the 'net

Heineken Meets Star Wars

A beer light years ahead of its competition

Heineken Meets Star Wars thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Un-beer-ievable robot ad

QuotaBills
Beer speaks. People mumble. - Tony McGee

Payday came and with it beer. - Rudyard Kipling

Now, young Skywalker... you will die. - The Emperor

Religions change; beer and wine remain. - Hervey Allen

Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder. - Unknown

For NASA, space is still a high priority. - Dan Quayle

Good Anakin. Good. Kill him. Kill him now. - Chancellor Palpatine

What we need is Star Peace and not Star Wars. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Space ails us moderns: we are sick with space. - Robert Frost

Beer, it's the best damn drink in the world. - Jack Nicholson

What two ideas are more inseparable than Beer and Britannia? - Sydney Smith

I'm only a beer teetotaller, not a champagne teetotaller. - George Bernard Shaw

My husband said he needed more space. So I locked him outside. - Roseanne Barr

I never drank anything stronger than beer before I was twelve. - WC Fields

In heaven there is no beer...
That's why we drink ours here. - Unknown

Space is almost infinite. As a matter of fact, we think it is infinite. - Dan Quayle

The dinosaurs became extinct because they didn't have a space program. - Larry Niven

Humor does not diminish the pain - it makes the space around it get bigger. - Allen Klein

If women can be railroad workers in Russia, why can't they fly in space? - Valentina Tereshkova

In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria. - Ben Franklin

Anakin, you're breaking my heart! And you're going down a path I cannot follow! - Padme

You call this a party? The beer is warm, the women cold and I'm hot under the collar. - Groucho Marx

Great music is as much about the space between the notes as it is about the notes themselves. - Sting

An Irishman after trying American beer for the first time: "Put it back in the horse!" - Unknown

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

Just be yourself, and hopefully they can shape an epic space adventure around exactly who you are. - Chris Pratt

The way you can understand all of the social media is as the creation of a new kind of public space. - Danah Boyd

The larger office, the corner space, the extra window are the teddy bears and tricycles of adult office life. - Willard Gaylin

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Be ruthless about your calendar - stick to it, hell or high water but create space for unstructured time as well. - Arjun Arora

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. - George Carlin

We're all trying to keep up in this stupid race. But that won't be much fun when we're floating in space. - John Symeou

Hello. I don't believe we have been introduced. R2-D2? A pleasure to meet you. I am C-3PO, Human-Cyborg Relations. - C-3PO

Oh my. Space travel sounds rather perilous. I can assure you they will never get me on one of those dreadful Star Ships. - C-3PO

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

The real lover is the man who can thrill you by kissing your forehead or smiling into your eyes or just staring into space. - Marilyn Monroe

As I hurtled through space, one thought kept crossing my mind - every part of this rocket was supplied by the lowest bidder. - John Glenn

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

If you sang "99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall" and counted all the numbers mentioned throughout the entire song, it would add up to 14,850. - Joe-kster


Winter Cyclist

No-Lake Picture

Morning Coffee Break

2020 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars (3)

Sign Crime

Royal Family Scrutiny

Bringing It Home

Secret Revealed

Women Pro Golfers

Alternative To Spanking

Laser Cats

At My Age I Need Glasses

Yoga Wine

Slip Sliding Away

Wi-Fi Free Restaurant

Buffalo Construction Plans

For Best Results

Ruling On Criticism

Bacon Pancakes

Very Left Turn Driver

Cold Sermon

Store Tested Coffee

End Of The Line

Cow Vacation