House Appraisal

Bird House: Home Tweet Home. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What is a home without children? Quiet. - Henny Youngman

Art is a house that tries to be haunted. - Emily Dickinson

One aged man - one man - can't fill a house. - Robert Frost

We can dance on pinheads till the cows come home. - Alastair Campbell

Home cooking. Where many a man thinks his wife is. - Jimmy Durante

Art is the only way to run away without leaving home. - Twyla Tharp

What's the need of a home if you are never in it? - George Grossmith

He taught me housekeeping; when I divorce I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Mother is the home we come from. She is nature, soil, ocean. - Erich Fromm

An empty purse and a new house make a man wise, but too late. - Portuguese Proverb

God made rainy days so gardeners could get the housework done. - Unknown

A house with old furniture has no need of ghosts to be haunted. - Hope Mirrlees

Real Estate: What your house is called during divorce proceedings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Go big or go home. Because it's true. What do you have to lose? - Eliza Dushku

The world is a globe. The farther you sail, the closer to home you are. - Terry Pratchett

A bright person can always think of something better to do than housework. - Ruby Lou Barnhill

I bought a house on a one-way dead-end road. I don't know how I got there. - Steven Wright

Someone told me I was immature. Guess who's not allowed in my tree house now? - Unknown

I love contemporary art, although I wouldn't want a pickled shark in my house. - Bruno Tonioli

If you want to see me, come over anytime. If you want to see my house, make an appointment. - Unknown

God gives men wisdom as he gives them gold; his treasure house is not the mint, but the mine. - Arabic Proverb

Anyone who has been to an English public school will always feel comparatively at home in prison. - Unknown

People travel to faraway places to watch, in fascination, the kind of people they ignore at home. - Dagobert D. Runes

She did not know where her home was anymore, and this idea didn’t frighten her like it should. - T.M. Williams

My husband is so good at home repairs that they have a special VIP area for him in the emergency room. - Unknown

In France we leave unmolested those who set fire to the house, and persecute those who sound the alarm. - Sebastien Chamfort

Window Screen: 1. A device to prevent the escape of insects; 2. A device for keeping flies in the house. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The scorn men express for a male who does housework is exceeded only by their aversion to a woman who doesn't. - Penny Kome

What's a good investment? Go home from work early and spend the afternoon throwing a ball around with your son. - Ben Stein

We can't win at home, we can't win away. As general manager, I just can't figure out where else to play. - Jock Brown

A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

Last night my wife met me at the front door. She was wearing a sexy negligee. The only trouble was, she was coming home. - Rodney Dangerfield

Went to Disneyland because my daughter's obsessed with Mickey Mouse. She was so excited when I got home and told her. - Ryan Reynolds

Vacation Time: That period when the flowers in the home garden are at their best and only the neighbours are around to enjoy them - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Camping is not a date; it's an endurance test. If you can survive camping with someone, you should marry them on the way home. - Yvonne Prinz

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

If your house is really a mess and a stranger comes to the door, greet him with, "Who could have done this? We have no enemies." - Phyllis Diller

At this late hour a wagon has been procured, and I have had it filled with plate and the most valuable portable articles, belonging to the house. - Dolly Madison