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IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener

Exercise to help you prepare for this year's taxes!

IRS Middle Class Pencil Sharpener thanks to Bob 'MoSkeeterz' Carroll

Let the government sharpen your pencils

Taxes
Tax his land,
Tax his bed,
Tax the table
At which he's fed.

Tax his tractor,
Tax his mule,
Teach him taxes
Are the rule.

Tax his cow,
Tax his goat,
Tax his pants,
Tax his coat.

Tax his ties,
Tax his shirt,
Tax his work,
Tax his dirt.

Tax his tobacco,
Tax his drink,
Tax him if he tries to think.

Tax his cigars,
Tax his beers,
If he cries, then tax his tears.

Tax his car,
Tax his gas,
Find other ways to tax his ass.

Tax all he has,
Then let him know
That you won't be done 'til he has no dough.

When he screams and hollers,
Then tax him some more,
Tax him till he's good and sore.

Then tax his coffin,
Tax his grave,
Tax the sod in which he's laid.

Put these words upon his tomb,
“Taxes drove me to my doom.”

When he's gone, do not relax,
Its time to apply
The inheritance tax...

... and just a few more...
Accounts Receivable Tax
Building Permit Tax
CDL license Tax
Cigarette Tax
Corporate Income Tax
Dog License Tax
Excise Taxes
Federal Income Tax
Federal Unemployment Tax (FUTA)
Fishing License Tax
Food License Tax
Fuel permit tax
Gasoline Tax (42 cents per gallon)
Gross Receipts Tax
Hunting License Tax
Inheritance Tax
Interest expense
Inventory tax
IRS Interest Charges IRS Penalties
Liquor Tax
Luxury Taxes
Marriage License Tax
Medicare Tax
Personal Property Tax
Property Tax
Real Estate Tax
Service charge taxes
Social Security Tax
Road usage taxes
Sales Tax
Recreational Vehicle Tax
School Tax
State Income Tax
State Unemployment Tax (SUTA)
Telephone federal excise tax
Telephone federal universal service fee tax
Telephone federal, state and local surcharge taxes
Telephone minimum usage surcharge tax
Telephone recurring and non-recurring charges tax
Telephone state and local tax
Telephone usage charge tax
Utility Taxes
Vehicle License Registration Tax
Vehicle Sales Tax
Watercraft registration Tax
Well Permit Tax
Workers Compensation Tax

Not one of these taxes existed 100 years ago...
We had absolutely no national debt, had the largest middle class in the world,
and Mom stayed home to raise the kids...
What happened? Can you spell 'politicians'?
QuotaBills
Good government is good politics. - Richard J. Daley

Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

Politics makes strange postmasters. - Kin Hubbard

Pain is temporary; quitting is forever. - Lance Armstrong

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

God is a concept by which we measure our pain. - John Lennon

From politics, it was an easy step to silence. - Jane Austen

Death and taxes are unsolved engineering problems. - Romana Machado

Politicians can't manage. All they can do is talk. - Donald Trump

It is easy to stand a pain, but difficult to stand an itch. - Chang Ch'ao

Poetry is about the grief. Politics is about the grievance. - Robert Frost

History is a tool used by politicians to justify their intentions. - Ted Koppei

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

Bad politicians are sent to Washington by good people who don't vote. - William E. Simon

Out of suffering comes creativity. You cannot spell painting without pain. - John Lithgow

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased - thus do we refute entropy. - Spider Robinson

Politics is the art of choosing between the disastrous and the unpalatable. - John Kenneth Galbraith

Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain. - Joseph Campbell

You purchase pain with all that joy can give and die of nothing but a rage to live. - Alexander Pope

The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an election. - Earl Wilson

Next to being shot at and missed, nothing is quite so satisfying as an income tax refund. - Unknown

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

The difference between death and taxes is death doesn't get worse every time Congress meets. - Will Rogers

A little government and a little luck are necessary in life, but only a fool trusts either of them. - P.J. O'Rourke

The single most exciting thing you encounter in government is competence, because it's so rare. - Daniel P Moynihan

We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field. - Dwight D Eisenhower

When government accepts responsibility for people, then people no longer take responsibility for themselves. - George Pataki

The average pencil is seven inches long, with just a half-inch eraser - in case you thought optimism was dead. - Robert Brault

In America you can go on the air and kid the politicians,
and the politicians can go on the air and kid the people. - Groucho Marx

Very few of these panic-mongers have any personal knowledge of the countries that are already under blackshirt government. - Lord Rothermere

Politics is the art of looking for trouble, finding it everywhere, diagnosing it incorrectly, and applying the wrong remedy. - Groucho Marx

It is not in the nature of politics that the best men should be elected. The best men do not want to govern their fellowmen. - George MacDonald

Our future cannot depend on the government alone. The ultimate solutions lie in the attitudes and the actions of the American people. - Joe Biden

Politics is the gentle art of getting votes from the poor and campaign funds from the rich, by promising to protect each from the other. - Oscar Ameringer

Politicians also have no leisure, because they are always aiming at something beyond political life itself, power and glory, or happiness. - Aristotle

There are two ways you can get through pain. You can let it destroy you, or you can use it as fuel to drive you: to dream bigger, to work harder. - Taylor Swift

To be a champion, you have to learn to handle stress and pressure. But if you've prepared mentally and physically, you don't have to worry. - Harvey Mackay

Regarded simply as a politician, and compared with the other leading political figures of our time, how clean a smell he has managed to leave behind. - Mahatma Gandhi


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