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Politician Training

How to become a politician & fleece your consituents

Politician Training thanks to Ken Ward

New ethics training for politicians baaaaa-d for morale

QuotaBills
A week is a long time in politics. - Harold Wilson

Politics is war by other measures. - Steve Bannon

Politics makes strange red-fellows. - Will Rogers

In politics nothing is contemptible. - Benjamin Disraeli

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

In politics an absurdity is not a handicap. - Napoleon Bonaparte

All government, of course, is against liberty. - H L Mencken

Most bad government results from too much government. - Thomas Jefferson

The art of government is the organization of idolatry. - George Bernard Shaw

Politics doesn't make strange bedfellows - marriage does. - Groucho Marx

Politics is for the present, but an equation is for eternity. - Albert Einstein

Politics is too serious a matter to be left to the politicians. - Charles de Gaulle

War has rules, mud wrestling has rules - politics has no rules. - Ross Perot

In order to become the master, the politician poses as the servant. - Charles de Gaulle

The most important political office is that of the private citizen. - Louis D. Brandeis

I wish the government would put a tax on pianos for the incompetent. - Edith Sitwell

A politician is a man who approaches every problem with an open mouth. - Adlai Stevenson

Politics is the chloroform of the Irish people, or, rather the hashish. - Oliver St. John Gogarty

Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for. - Will Rogers

The flood of money that gushes into politics today is a pollution of democracy. - Theodore White

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. - Will Rogers

The fastest way for a politician to become an elder statesman is to lose an election. - Earl Wilson

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

In politics, if you want anything said, ask a man; if you want anything done, ask a woman. - Margaret Thatcher

That government is best which governs the least, because its people discipline themselves. - Thomas Jefferson

So, if we lie to the government, it's a felony.
But if they lie to us, it's politics. - Bill Murray

Get thee glass eyes;
And, like a scurvy politician, seem
To see the things thou dost not. - William Shakespeare

Government, even in its best state, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state, an intolerable one. - Thomas Paine

Ex-Presidents of the United States get state subsidies. Not so in Russia. You get no government support. - Mikhail Gorbachev

Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else. - Frederic Bastiat

Demagogue: A politician who can rock the boat and persuade everyone else that they're in a terrible storm - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Idealism is like a castle in the air if it is not based on a solid foundation of social and political realism. - Claude McKay

Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you. - Pericles (430 B.C.)

I have certain rules I live by. My first rule: I don't believe anything the government tells me. Nothing. Zero. - George Carlin

Politics is the only business where doing nothing other than making the other guy look bad is an acceptable outcome. - Mark Warner

I'm not interested in cutting the feet off my characters or stretching them to make them fit my certain political view. - Margaret Atwood

NEED now means wanting someone else's money. GREED means wanting to keep your own. COMPASSION is when a politician arranges the transfer. - Joseph Sobran

When I am abroad, I always make it a rule never to criticize or attack the government of my country. I make up for lost time when I am at home. - Winston Churchill

Our ancestors believed in magic, prayers, trickery, browbeating and bullying. I think it would be fair to sum that up as 'Irish politics'. - Flann O'Brien

Jokes of the proper kind, properly told, can do more to enlighten questions of politics, philosophy, and literature than any number of dull arguments. - Isaac Asimov


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