Redneck Porch Hunter

Gun Control: Using both hands - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Leave the gun, take the cannoli. - The Godfather

A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton

The gun is not out of Irish politics. - Ian Paisley

A gun gives you the body, not the bird. - Henry David Thoreau

What happens in the hot tub stays in the hot tub. - Aussie Swimmer

Big shots are only little shots who keep shooting. - Christopher Morley

The end move in politics is always to pick up a gun. - R Buckminster Fuller

Hunting: the least honorable form of war on the weak. - Paul Richard

Oh, that sound? I'm in the hot tub, reading a novel. - Jane Smiley

A Canadian is sort of like an American, but without the gun. - Unknown

Deer hunting would be fine sport, if only the deer had guns. - W S Gilbert

The perils of duck hunting are great - especially for the duck. - Walter Cronkite

Hunting isn't just something I do. It's part of who I am. - Unknown

When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi

Diploma: 1. Da man dat fixes your pipes; 2. A job-hunting license. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

If you need 100 rounds to kill a deer, maybe hunting isn't your sport. - Elayne Boosler

Your heaviest artillery will be your will to live. Keep that big gun going. - Norman Cousins

You can get a lot farther with a kind word and a gun than a kind word alone. - Al Capone

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

If you have a gun you can rob a bank, but if you have a bank you can rob everyone. - Unknown

Hunting is not a sport. In a sport, both sides should know they're in the game. - Paul Rodriguez

Grandchildren are God's rewards to grandparents for not shooting their children. - Unknown

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I take a gun in hand, the safest place for a pheasant is just opposite the muzzle. - Sydney Smith

While I love shooting in New York City, I look forward to filming season six in Los Angeles. - Donald Trump

For short term relaxation, I take a hot tub. It's my best way to unblock writer's block. - Ellen Hopkins

My tastes are not those of the king, who has none, except for hunting and mechanic's labour. - Marie Antoinette

The difference between a gun and a tree is a difference of tempo. The tree explodes every spring. - Ezra Pound

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

If you turn the imagination loose like a hunting dog, it will often return with the bird in its mouth. - William Maxwell

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

A critic is someone who never actually goes to the battle, yet who afterwards comes out shooting the wounded. - Tyne Daly

You see I'm against hunting, in fact I'm a hunt saboteur. I go out the night before and shoot the fox. - Tim Vine

The policemen or soldiers are only a gun in the establishments hand. They make the racist secure in his racism. - Huey Newton

I am getting to an age when I can only enjoy the last sport left. It is called 'hunting for your spectacles.' - Edward Grey

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun. - P G Wodehouse

Paul Revere was warning the British about gun control, and George Washington apparently was crossing the Delaware to bomb an abortion clinic. - Bill Maher

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There is no hunting like the hunting of man, and those who have hunted armed men long enough and liked it, never care for anything else thereafter. - Ernest Hemingway