#1 humor site on the 'net

Shoelusion

Latest in 'feet feat' fashion - one size feets all

Shoelusion thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
When you pray, move your feet. - African Proverb

One shoe change can change your life. - Cinderella

Nurses are angels in comfortable shoes. - Unknown

My little dog - a heartbeat at my feet. - Edith Wharton

If the shoe fits, get another one just like it. - George Carlin

Lawyers are the foot soldiers of our Constitution. - Rennard Strickland

Hiking and happiness go hand in hand (or foot in boot). - Diane Spicer

Yardstick: One foot on each side and one in the middle. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A rabbit's foot is a poor substitute for horse sense. - Unknown

The one thing children wear out faster than shoes is parents. - John J. Plomp

Be sure to put your feet in the right place, then stand firm. - Abraham Lincoln

I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet. - Mohandas K. Gandhi

It doesn't work to leap a twenty-foot chasm in two ten-foot jumps. - Proverb

A man who has both feet planted firmly in the air can be safely called a liberal. - American Proverb

A lie can travel halfway around the world while the truth is putting on its shoes. - Mark Twain

Each year it grows harder to make ends meet - the ends I refer to are hands and feet. - Richard Armour

You can't sweep other people off their feet if you can't be swept off your own. - Clarence Day

By the time they're ready to be thrown away, most shoes are thoroughly comfortable. - Andy Rooney

A slip of the foot you may soon recover, but a slip of the tongue you may never get over. - Benjamin Franklin

Stretching his hand up to reach the stars, too often man forgets the flowers at his feet. - Jeremy Bentham

Progress always involves risk; you can't steal second base and keep your foot on first. - Frederick Wilcox

I don't look to jump over 7-foot bars. I look around for 1-foot bars that I can step over. - Warren Buffett

Those who have one foot in the canoe and one foot in the boat are going to fall into the river. - Tuscarora Proverb

Don't criticize what you don't understand, son. You never walked in that man's shoes. - Elvis Presley

We laid the track on a smooth stretch of ground about one hundred feet north of the new building. - Orville Wright

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

I carry a golf ball to put under my feet when they get tight, and a Ther-Band for general stretching. - Jessica Ennis-Hill

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler. - WC Fields

Psychiatry is the art of teaching people how to stand on their own two feet while reclining on couches. - Sigmund Freud

How beautiful upon the mountains are the feet of him that bringeth good tidings, that publisheth peace. - Isaiah 52:7

I hate it when my foot falls asleep during the day because that means it's going to be up all night. - Steven Wright

C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg. - Bjarne Stroustrup

Just like a shoe, if someone is meant for you, they will fit just perfectly. No forcing, no struggling, and no pain. - Unknown

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

What was most significant about the lunar voyage was not that men set foot on the moon but that they set eye on the earth. - Norman Cousins

I'm not interested in cutting the feet off my characters or stretching them to make them fit my certain political view. - Margaret Atwood

You can imagine me as a kid growing up in redneck Texas with ballet shoes, tucking the violin under my arm. I had to fight my way up. - Patrick Swayze

I'm pretty sure that eating chocolate keeps wrinkles away because I have never seen a 10 year old with a Hershey bar and crows feet. - Amy Neftzger

I have but one lamp by which my feet are guided; and that is the lamp of experience. I know of no way of judging the future but by the past. - Patrick Henry

Lawyers are like unrequited lovers: you give them an inch, and they go for the whole nine yards; you take off one shoe, and they pull down your pants. - Andres Rueda


Saying Pun

Redneck Blinds

Kid Disposal

Motorvation

Electric Football

Montgomery Ward 1934 Christmas Catalog

Halloween Lamp

Making Music Together

Back Asswards

Tent Peg Setup

Fang Treats

Model T Snowmobile

Skinny Puddy Tat

Redneck Cocktail

Drug Dog Search

Vice Grip Handles

Nouveau Riche

Triple Bypass Burger

Hyphenated Names

Indian Fish Pond

Lunch Anyone?

Wet T-Shirt Contest Winners

Giraffe Lunch

Bathroom Celebration