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Chewing Gum Hazard

Government Health Warning - beware of 'Hemorrhoid Helper' workouts

Chewing Gum Hazard thanks to Wally Zatylny

Hemorrhoid Helper Class - Rectum? Darned near killed 'em!

QuotaBills
The first wealth is health. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I'm in no shape to exercise. - Unknown

I left as welcome as a fart in a spacesuit. - Billy Connolly

I'm so unfamiliar with the gym I call it James. - Chi McBride

God did not intend religion to be an exercise club. - Naguib Mahfouz

Health insurance should be a given for every citizen. - Jesse Ventura

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to exercise with her. - Archie Bunker

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Motivation is the fuel, necessary to keep the human engine running. - Zig Ziglar

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I'd be honest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Every time I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. - Robert M Hutchins

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D Rockefeller

Never let success get to your head. Never let failure get to your health. - Unknown

Risks must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is to risk nothing. - Leo Buscaglia

Fitness needs to be perceived as fun and games or we subconsciously avoid it. - Alan Thicke

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

Why are hemorrhoids called "hemorrhoids" instead of "assteroids"? - George Carlin

You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you. - Rwandan Proverb

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

If you're not paying for it through the health plan, you pay for it in the emergency room. - David Lehman

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

Owning our story can be hard but not nearly as difficult as spending our lives running from it. - Brene Brown

Every leap year I like to jump. It’s a good way to get my daily exercise in every four years. - Jarod Kintz

Gratitude is a twofold love - love coming to visit us, and love running out to greet a welcome guest. - Henry Van Dyke

A life coach does for the rest of your life what a personal trainer does for your health and fitness. - Elaine MacDonald

They have gun control in Cuba. They have universal health care in Cuba. So why do they want to come here? - Paul Harvey

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

I don't know what that gas is made of, but it can't smell any worse than Ernie Johnson 's gym bag. - Charles Barkley

Even if you don't have time for a big workout, stretching in the morning and night really changes your body. - Erin Heatherton

Figure out what you hope for. Live inside that hope, running down its hallways, touching the walls on both sides. - Barbara Kingsolver

Happiness consists in activity: such is the constitution of our nature; it is a running stream, and not a stagnant pool. - John M. Good

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Tarry a moment to watch the chaos of a playground, crayola-colored shirts of running children, all trying out their wings. - Dr. SunWolf

You can catch health, happiness, and success from others just as easily as you can catch worries, bitterness, and failure. - Dale Carnegie

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

I've seen so many young men over the years who think they're running at other young men. They are not. They are running at me. - Markus Zusak

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

The music that really turns me on is either running toward God or away from God. Both recognize the pivot, that God is at the center of the jaunt. - Bono


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