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Chewing Gum Hazard

Government Health Warning - beware of 'Hemorrhoid Helper' workouts

Chewing Gum Hazard thanks to Wally Zatylny

Hemorrhoid Helper Class - Rectum? Darned near killed 'em!

QuotaBills
We are here on Earth to fart around. - Kurt Vonnegut

Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway. - Unknown

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

Of all the 36 alternatives, running away is best. - Chinese Proverb

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Attention to health is life's greatest hindrance. - Plato

Health insurance should be a given for every citizen. - Jesse Ventura

My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine. - Caroline Rhea

I'm into fitness: Fit'ness whole donut in my mouth. - Unknown

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

Our health is a voyage and every illness is an adventure story. - Margiad Evans

Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith

That Gerald Ford. He can't fart and chew gum at the same time. - Lyndon B. Johnson

Every time I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. - Robert Hutchins

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

The race is not always to the swift, but to those who keep on running. - Unknown

Being in a good frame of mind helps one keep in the picture of health. - Unknown

One cannot spend one's entire life running into bathrooms when danger calls! - Reif Larsen

It was amazing I won. I was running against peace and prosperity and incumbency. - George W. Bush

Health care's not about insurance! Health care's about getting treatment. - P.J. O'Rourke

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

People don't trust private health insurance companies for all the right reasons. - Bernie Sanders

There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to play with matches. - Will Rogers

But we have to pass the [health care] bill so that you can find out what's in it. - Nancy Pelosi

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you. - Rwandan Proverb

Our marriage vows: till death do us part, for better for worse, in secrets and in health. - Archie Bunker

Having insurance doesn't guarantee good health outcomes, but it is a critical factor. - Irwin Redlener

We don't come to Canada for our health. We can think of other ways of enjoying ourselves. - Prince Philip

If you think health care is expensive now, wait until you see what it costs when it's free. - P.J. O'Rourke

The test and the use of man's education is that he finds pleasure in the exercise of his mind. - Jacques Martin Barzun

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got. - WC Fields

The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score. - Bill Copeland

Moderation. Small helpings. Sample a little bit of everything. These are the secrets of happiness and good health. - Julia Child

When wealth is lost, nothing is lost. When health is lost, something is lost. When character is lost, all is lost. - Rev. Billy Graham

My doctor recently told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already. - Milton Berle

Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden

You end up as you deserve. In old age you must put up with the face, the friends, the health, and the children you have earned. - Fay Weldon

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker


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