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Husband of the Year

Ole shared everything with his wife - even his work

Husband of the Year thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
A good husband is healthy and absent. - Japanese Proverb

I'm not aging, I'm marinating. - Unknown

Aging wrinkles the body. Quitting wrinkles the soul. - Douglas MacArthur

A woman is attractive when she is somebody else's wife. - African Proverb

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

My wife made me join a bridge club. I jump off next Tuesday. - Rodney Dangerfield

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman

When I die, bury me on the golf course so my husband will visit. - Unknown

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

In my house I'm the boss. My wife is just the decision maker. - Woody Allen

Harem: A community of women who subscribe to a circulating husband - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

A husband is what is left of a lover, after the nerve has been extracted. - Helen Rowland

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her. - Rodney Dangerfield

When my wife asked me to start a garden the first thing I dug up was an excuse. - Henny Youngman

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

A son is a son till he takes him a wife, a daughter is a daughter all of her life. - Unknown

A man loves his sweetheart the most, his wife the best, but his mother the longest. - Irish Proverb

Husband-hunting: A sport in which the animal that gets caught has to buy the license - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

Mirror: A truthful reflector shunned by vampires, hypocrites and aging fashion models - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look. - Mia Farrow

In life, it's not who you know that's important, it's how your wife found out. - Joey Adams

Valentine's Day - a nice holiday because it's the first day of the rest of your wife. - Milton Berle

During sex my wife always wants to talk to me. Just the other night she called me from a hotel. - Rodney Dangerfield

Psychiatrist: a person who will give you expensive answers that your wife will give you for free. - Unknown

If you marry a man who cheats on his wife, you'll be married to a man who cheats on his wife. - Ann Landers

The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his checkbook open. - Groucho Marx

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

When discovered by his wife, kissing the maid, Groucho said, "I was just whispering in her mouth". - Groucho Marx

A man with a career can have no time to waste upon his wife and friends; he has to devote it wholly to his enemies. - John Hobbes

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

I like to do things for my wife on Valentine's Day. I open the door for her when she puts laundry in the washing machine. - Milton Berle

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

Aging: 1. A supposed ripening into wisdom that most Westerners attempt to delay as long as possible; 2. A one-way street with no stoplights. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch." - Phyllis Diller

Some people claim that marriage interferes with romance. There's no doubt about it. Anytime you have a romance, your wife is bound to interfere. - Groucho Marx


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