#1 humor site on the 'net

Twin Dish

New satellite TV system for pets

Twin Dish thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Happiness was born a twin. - Lord Byron

Sleeping dogs bark the loudest. - Archie Bunker

Dyspupsia: Being sick as a dog. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cobra: Bra worn by Siamese twins. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

It's the hottest thing on television. - Donald Trump

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

Better to be the head of a dog than the tail of a lion. - English Proverb

Life doesn't imitate art; it imitates bad television. - Woody Allen

Babysitters: Girls you hire to watch your television set. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Television has been the single greatest shaper of emptiness. - Ravi Zacharias

My wife's such a bad cook, the dog begs for Alka-Seltzer. - Rodney Dangerfield

A hot dog at the ballpark is better than a steak at the Ritz. - Humphrey Bogart

Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called "Ego". - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

It's very nearly impossible to tell the truth in television. - Malcolm Muggeridge

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

Television Programming: Material that fills the time between commercials - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than you love yourself. - Josh Billings

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

When advice is freely given, the receiver is free to use it as he or she sees fit. - Harvey Mackay

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

I love working in Canada. The ovation is great. It makes me feel like I'm the top dog. - Owen Hart

A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley

I have had my television aerials removed. It is the moral equivalent of a prostate operation. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is certain dogs I know will go to heaven, and very, very few people. - James Thurber

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

If it weren't for Philo T. Farnsworth, inventor of the television, we'd still be eating frozen radio dinners. - Johnny Carson

Why something in the public interest such as television news can be fought over, like a chain of hamburger stands, eludes me. - Jimmy Breslin

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain

More people watch television and get their information that way than read books. I find new technology and new ways of communication very exciting. - Stephen Covey


Redneck Sandals

Down Under Statue

Ventriloquist Isolation

Dr. Hedgehog

Flower Frame Heels

PEI Weather

Frankfurt Subway Entrance

Shopping With Your Husband

Where is Waldo?

Costco Beach Towel

Handwritting

July 4th Balloon

Maritime Treat

Redneck Wheelchair Stroller

Reflective Art

Canadian Drive-Thru

Work At Home Mom

German Car Parkade

Dog Face or Dog Butt?

Trunk Minions

Despicable Watermelon

New Parking Spot For Women

Popcorn Cremation

Time Is Free