#1 humor site on the 'net

Water On Steps

Management attempts to water down its safety program

Water On Steps thanks to Scott Brunson

The water aerobics class is now outside until further notice

QuotaBills
Water rusts pipes. - WC Fields

RIP boiling water - you will be mist. - Unknown

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

Thirst was made for water; inquiry for truth. - C S Lewis

Water, taken in moderation, cannot hurt anybody. - Mark Twain

Caution is not cowardice; even the ants march armed. - Uganda

A mixture of brandy and water spoils two good things. - Charles Lamb

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

I drank some boiling water because I wanted to whistle. - Mitch Hedberg

Big ships can only be launched where the water is deep. - Amish Saying

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

If there is magic on this planet, it is contained in water. - Loren Eiseley

Ice Water? Get some Onions - that'll make your eyes water! - Groucho Marx

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

There is no elevator to success - you have to take the stairs. - Unknown

Washable: What a cowboy does, very carefully, with soap and water - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water, air, and cleanliness are the chief articles in my pharmacy. - Napoleon Bonaparte

Don't think there are no crocodiles because the water is calm. - Malayan Proverb

I have learned to use the word impossible with the greatest caution. - Wernher von Braun

Somewhere, behind space and time,
Is wetter water, slimier slime. - Rupert Brooke

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

The four building blocks of the universe are fire, water, gravel and vinyl. - Dave Barry

You can lead a horse to water but I'd rather ride it to the liquor store. - Wayne Nowazek

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

Most whale photos you see show whales in this beautiful blue water - it's almost like space. - Brian Skerry

The heights charm us, but the steps do not; with the mountain in our view we love to walk the plains. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

When it is obvious that the goals cannot be reached, don't adjust the goals, adjust the action steps. - Confucius

Like the old adverb, "you can lead a gift horse to the water but ya can't look in his mouth." - Archie Bunker

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

Milk is the drink of babies, tea the drink of women, water the drink of beasts, and wine is the drink of the gods. - John S Blackie

I love Canada. It makes a nice hat for America. When America runs out of water, it's the first place I'll go. - Ryan Reynolds

Do you think courage means being fearless? Or daring? Courage, real courage, is taking three steps when it terrifies you. - Catherine Anderson

After all, when a stone is dropped into a pond, the water continues quivering even after the stone has sunk to the bottom. - Arthur Golden

A life of unremitting caution, without the carefree - or even, occasionally, the careless - may turn out to be half a life. - Anna Quindlen

Love would never be a promise of a rose garden unless it is showered with light of faith, water of sincerity and air of passion. - Unknown

Menopause is thicker than water. When we talk and laugh about it, we learn and relax. It's a life transition, not a disease. - Unknown

Memory is a net: one finds it full of fish when he takes it from the brook, but a dozen miles of water have run through it without sticking. - Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr.


Instant Acrophobia

How To Hire Engineers

Business School Basics

Waterwheel Rotisserie

Elephant Bus

Promote Yourself

Time Machine

Redneck Engagement Ring

Forever Clean Toilet

Edible Clock

Up-Set & Hungry Trucks

Bear Pinata

Swim Vacation

What Are Your Skills?

Portable Barber Shop

Snail Trail

Anger Release Machine

Pun-e Signs

Wake Me At Noon

Pringle Art

Lodge Welcome

Holstein or Holestein?

Dead Poirot

Restroom Fragrance