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A Mother's Day Special

Don't ignore your gut feelings!

A Mother's Day Special thanks to Kyle Ziegler

California Colon Hydrotherapy - for memorable occasions

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Mother is a verb, not a noun. - Shonda Rhimes

Silence is the mother of truth. - Benjamin Disraeli

Gin was mother's milk to her. - George Bernard Shaw

Diligence is the mother of good fortune. - Benjamin Disraeli

Necessity is the mother of taking chances. - Mark Twain

A child's first teacher is its mother. - Peng Liyuan

Antisocial: Mother's sister being friendly. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Me and your mother ain't no duke or duke-ess. - Archie Bunker

Nothing is really lost until your Mom can't find it. - Unknown

Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same. - Oscar Wilde

Mother is a verb. It's something you do. Not just who you are. - Dorothy C Fisher

A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but you mean your mother. - Unknown

My wife and I are getting remarried. Our divorce didn't work out. - Rodney Dangerfield

Be kind to your mother-in-law but pay for her board at some good hotel. - Josh Billings

Summer Camps: Those places where little boys go for mother's vacation. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

The influence of a mother in the lives of her children is beyond calculation. - James E Faust

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

My mom always said, "Don't say if I make it", say, "When I make it!" - Mariah Carey

My wife is such a bad cook, if we leave dental floss in the kitchen the roaches hang themselves. - Rodney Dangerfield

The art of medicine consists of amusing the patient, whilst Mother Nature takes care of the cure. - Voltaire

The choice to become a mother is the choice to become one of the greatest spiritual teachers there is. - Oprah Winfrey

The older I grow, the more I realize that my mother is the best 'best friend' that I ever had. - Unknown

Some of these people need ten years of therapy - ten sentences of mine do not equal ten years of therapy. - Oscar Wilde

If I have done anything in life worth attention, I feel sure that I inherited the disposition from my mother. - Booker T. Washington

There has never been, nor will there ever be, anything quite so special as the love between a mother and a son. - Unknown

I love those hockey moms. You know what they say the difference between a hockey mom and a pit bull is? Lipstick. - Sarah Palin

A man with a career can have no time to waste upon his wife and friends; he has to devote it wholly to his enemies. - John Hobbes

My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher. - Socrates

My Mother: She is beautiful, softened at the edges and tempered with a spine of steel. I want to grow old and be like her. - Jodi Picoult

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

Fall: The season when your wife buys new winter clothes so she will have something to wear when she goes out shopping for spring outfits - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My mother was a reader, and she read to us. She read us Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde when I was six and my brother was eight. I never forgot it. - Stephen King

Secretary: "It must be hard to lose your mother-in-law." WC Fields: "Yes it is, very hard. It's almost impossible." - WC Fields

The most beautiful word on the lips of mankind is the word 'Mother', and the most beautiful call is the call of 'My Mother'. - Kahlil Gibran

I think, at a child's birth, if a mother could ask a fairy godmother to endow it with the most useful gift, that gift should be curiosity. - Eleanor Roosevelt

Chutzpa is that quality enshrined in a man who, having killed his mother and father, throws himself on the mercy of the court because he is an orphan. - Leo Rosten


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