Best Retriever

Zit: Command given to a spotted dog - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A fool and his money are soon elected. - Will Rogers

Money: the poor man's credit card. - Marshal McLuhan

Virtue has never as respectable as money. - Mark Twain

Our dog died from licking our wedding picture. - Phyllis Diller

Money follows passion - not the other way around. - Unknown

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

Money no longer talks. It just goes without saying. - George Humphrey

Money can't buy happiness, but neither can poverty. - Leo Rosten

I love to go to Washington - if only to be near my money. - Bob Hope

Gigantic: The biggest, scariest bug in your dog's fur - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Government always finds a need for whatever money it gets. - Ronald Reagan

Dogs are not our whole life, but they make our lives whole. - Roger Caras

Nobody works as hard for his money as the man who marries it. - Kin Hubbard

By the time I have money to burn, my fire will have burnt out. - Unknown

The best way to ruin a comedy is to throw a lot of money at it. - Jay Leno

Dogs are getting bigger, according to a leading dog manufacturer. - Leo Rosten

Only a biker knows why a dog sticks his head out of a car window. - Unknown

The key to making money in stocks is not to get scared out of them. - Peter Lynch

All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy. - Spike Milligan

How much money does it take to make a man happy? Just one more dollar. - John D Rockefeller

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

Money can't buy happiness, but it helps you look for it in more places. - Milton Berle

Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in. - Mark Twain

France is a country where the money falls apart but you can't tear the toilet paper. - Billy Wilder

He's so old that when he orders a three-minute egg, they ask for the money up front. - Milton Berle

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

Money can't buy happiness. But, it can buy a chocolate, which is pretty much the same thing. - Hanako Ishii

Beware of those who would pay you lip service but refuse to put their money where their mouths are. - Faydra D. Fields

Every two months, I would get an email, 'Skeleton Twins update: still don't have the money!' - Bill Hader

For us in Russia, communism is a dead dog, while, for many people in the West, it is still a living lion. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

Income: 1. Something you cannot live without nor within; 2. The sum of money which it costs more than to live. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Work like you don't need the money, dance like no one is watching, and love like you've never been hurt. - Mark Twain

Anything which is physically possible can always be made financially possible; money is a bugaboo of small minds. - Robert A. Heinlein

If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin' somebody else's dog around. - Unknown

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid; 'What am I going to do with two dead dogs?' - Gary Delaney

Retirement is like a long vacation in Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. - Jonathan Clements

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer