Bucket Bath

Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin

Children are the wisdom of the nation. - African Saying

Germs: The only things kids will share freely - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Raising kids is part joy and part guerrilla warfare. - Ed Asner

I wrote a few children's books... not on purpose. - Steven Wright

Insanity is hereditary. You get it from your children. - Sam Levenson

He knows his olive trees better than he knows his children. - Rebecca Helm-Ropelato

Give a little love to a child, and you get a great deal back. - John Ruskin

As long as you know men are like children, you know everything. - Coco Chanel

Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us. - Stephen Colbert

Jackpot: When all the kids stay at friends' homes for the night - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Cleaning up with children around is like shoveling during a blizzard. - Margaret C Banning

Creative play is like a spring that bubbles up from deep within a child. - Joan Almon

There's only one pretty child in the world, and every mother has it. - English Proverb

I take my children everywhere, but they always find their way back home. - Robert Orben

Every child comes with the message that God is not yet discouraged of man. - Rabindranath Tagore

Who is more foolish, the child afraid of the dark or the man afraid of the light? - Maurice Freehill

Having a baby is like falling in love again, both with your husband and your child. - Tina Brown

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

When I was a child, I wanted to raise horses in Wyoming or be a cabin boy on a pirate ship. - Sadie Jones

I had a very happy childhood, which is unsuitable if you're going to be an Irish writer. - Maeve Binchy

A mother's love for her child is like nothing else in the world. It knows no law, no pity. - Agatha Christie

It's not uncommon to see kids on the school bus reading books and doing homework on the bus. - Anthony Amero

I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them. - Phyllis Diller

You know what it's like having five kids? Imagine you're drowning. And someone hands you a baby. - Jim Gaffigan

Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them. - Oscar Wilde

Inspiration comes unawares, from unaccountable sources that have nothing to do with planning or intelligence. - Maurice Chevalier

Success is the child of drudgery and perseverance. It cannot be coaxed or bribed; pay the price and it is yours. - Orison Swett Marden

No man should bring children into the world who is unwilling to persevere to the end in their nature and education. - Plato

Children are smarter than any of us. Know how I know that? I don't know one child with a full time job and children. - Bill Hicks

My kids always perceived the bathroom as a place where you wait it out until all the groceries are unloaded from the car. - Erma Bombeck

In most homes, the father is concerned with parking space, the children with outer space, and the mother with closet space. - Evan Esar

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

Grandparent: 1. One who knows that spanking is unnecessary; 2. The simplest toy, one which even the youngest child can operate. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Abundance and vigor of automatic movements are desirable, and even a considerable degree of restlessness is a good sign in young children. - G Stanley Hall

I've got this thing for spicy stuff. Now, if you give me hot chocolate with chili pepper, a book and a bubble bath, I'm a happy girl. - Shiloh Walker

When I know that, if I have no inspiration whatsoever, when I come and I just feel empty, I have nothing, I know that I can still play the scene. - Christopher Walken

Summer is a drag because even normal people become obsessed with their bodies. A bad bathing suit can humiliate you more tan anything else in life. - Conan O'Brien

Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer

Mothers and their children are in a category all their own. There's no bond so strong in the entire world. No love so instantaneous and forgiving. - Gail Tsukiyama