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Different Drugs
Drug problem to make the world a better place
America would be a better place with this type of drug problem
Drugs stronger than cocaine, crack or heroin
The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a Methamphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining county and he asked me a rhetorical question. "Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?"
I replied, "I had a drug problem when I was young: I was drug to church on Sunday morning. I was drug to church for weddings and funerals. I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather. I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults. I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort in everything that was asked of me.
I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profanity. I was drug out to pull weeds in mom's garden and flower beds and cockleburs out of dad's fields. I was drug to the homes of family, friends and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood, and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.
Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, or think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem, America would be a better place.
God bless the parents who drugged us."
The other day, someone at a store in our town read that a Methamphetamine lab had been found in an old farmhouse in the adjoining county and he asked me a rhetorical question. "Why didn't we have a drug problem when you and I were growing up?"
I replied, "I had a drug problem when I was young: I was drug to church on Sunday morning. I was drug to church for weddings and funerals. I was drug to family reunions and community socials no matter the weather. I was drug by my ears when I was disrespectful to adults. I was also drug to the woodshed when I disobeyed my parents, told a lie, brought home a bad report card, did not speak with respect, spoke ill of the teacher or the preacher, or if I didn't put forth my best effort in everything that was asked of me.
I was drug to the kitchen sink to have my mouth washed out with soap if I uttered a profanity. I was drug out to pull weeds in mom's garden and flower beds and cockleburs out of dad's fields. I was drug to the homes of family, friends and neighbors to help out some poor soul who had no one to mow the yard, repair the clothesline, or chop some firewood, and, if my mother had ever known that I took a single dime as a tip for this kindness, she would have drug me back to the woodshed.
Those drugs are still in my veins and they affect my behavior in everything I do, say, or think. They are stronger than cocaine, crack, or heroin; and, if today's children had this kind of drug problem, America would be a better place.
God bless the parents who drugged us."
Nature is cheaper than therapy. - M P Zarrella
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
About half my time is spent on business operation type stuff. - Mark Zuckerberg
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown
You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb
Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. - Homer Simpson
The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
There are some things in life where it's better to receive than to give, and massage is one of them. - Al Michaels
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard
The doctor is to be feared more than the disease. - French Proverb
Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito
A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx
A half doctor near is better than a whole one far away. - German Proverb
No man is a good doctor who has never been sick himself. - Chinese Proverb
About half my time is spent on business operation type stuff. - Mark Zuckerberg
Medicine is a science of uncertainty and an art of probability. - William Osler
A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier
Confucius say: "Man who want pretty nurse, must be patient." - Unknown
You couldn't tell if she was dressed for an opera or an operation. - Irvin S Cobb
Fame was like a drug. But what was even more like a drug were the drugs. - Homer Simpson
The good-news stories in medicine are early detection, early intervention. - Thomas R Insel
When it comes to plastic surgery and sushi, never be attracted by a bargain. - Graham Norton
A woman doctor is only good for women's problems - like your groinocology - Archie Bunker
A hospital should also have a recovery room adjoining the cashier's office. - Francis O'Walsh
The best doctors in the world are Doctor Diet, Doctor Quiet, and Doctor Merryman. - Jonathan Swift
I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for. - James H. Boren
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places. - Henny Youngman
The practice of medicine occurs even in primitive society, but law accompanies civilization. - Saying
Medicine, the only profession that labours incessantly to destroy the reason for its own existence. - James Bryce
When I was born the Doctor took one look at my face, turned me over and said, "Look, twins!" - Rodney Dangerfield
To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead. - Thomas Paine
There are some things in life where it's better to receive than to give, and massage is one of them. - Al Michaels
The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain
The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
The New England Journal of Medicine reports that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that 1 out of 10 doctors is an idiot. - Jay Leno
Following his doctor's orders, Nikita (Khrushchev) has cut his drinking in half. He's leaving out the water. - Bob Hope
Despite all our toil and progress, the art of medicine still falls somewhere between trout casting and spook writing. - Ben Hecht
The public blabbers about preventive medicine, but will neither appreciate nor pay for it. You get paid for what you cure. - Martin H. Fischer
'Psychotherapy' is a private, confidential conversation that has nothing to do with illness, medicine, or healing. - Thomas Szasz
A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown
Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer
Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles
Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer
One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler
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