Hopscotch for Seniors

What do women want? - Sigmund Freud

Women's word is never done. - American Proverb

Insomnia is my greatest inspiration. - Jon Stewart

There are no ugly women, only lazy ones. - Helena Rubinstein

Americans like fat books and thin women. - Russell Baker

Women are made to be loved, not understood. - Oscar Wilde

Women are meant to be loved, not to be understood. - Oscar Wilde

Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. - George Carlin

Women need a reason to have sex. Men just need a place. - Billy Crystal

Women like silent men, they think they're listening. - George Carlin

Women's styles may change but their designs remain the same. - Oscar Wilde

How do you feel about women's rights? I like either side of them. - Groucho Marx

Women should not have children after 35. Really? 35 children is enough. - Bill Murray

Amateurs wait for inspiration. The rest of us just get up and go to work. - Chuck Close

Back then the women had babies, which they called in them days, begatten. - Archie Bunker

Don't focus on regrets; find your inspiration in what you can do now. - Catherine Pulsifer

Sure I'm for helping the elderly. I'm going to be old myself some day. - Lillian Carter

If you think women are the weaker sex, try pulling the blanket back to your side. - Stuart Turner

To God I speak Spanish, to women Italian, to men French, and to my horse - German. - Emperor Charles V

He is useless on top of the ground; he ought to be under it, inspiring the cabbages. - Mark Twain

A consultant is a man who knows 147 ways to make love, but doesn't know any women. - Unknown

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

The trouble with some women is that they get all excited about nothing - and then marry him. - Cher

It is easier for a woman to defend her virtue against men than her reputation against women. - French Proverb

The fantasy of every Australian man is to have two women - one cleaning and the other dusting. - Maurenn Murphy

To my eye, women get sexier around 35. They know a thing or two, and knowledge is always alluring. - Pierce Brosnan

The fickleness of the women I love is only equalled by the infernal constancy of the women who love me. - George Bernard Shaw

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

The men who have furnished me with my greatest inspiration have not been men of wealth, but men of deeds. - James C Penney

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public. - Phyllis Diller

If women want any rights more than they got, why don't they just take them and not be talking about it? - Sojourner Truth

Women are like cars: we all want a Ferrari, sometimes want a pick-up truck, and end up with a station wagon. - Tim Allen

Inspiration comes unawares, from unaccountable sources that have nothing to do with planning or intelligence. - Maurice Chevalier

Between men and women there is no friendship possible. There is passion, enmity, worship, love, but no friendship. - Oscar Wilde

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Women marry men hoping they will change. Men marry women hoping they will not. So each is inevitably disappointed. - Albert Einstein

Ninety percent I'll spend on good times, women and Irish Whiskey. The other ten percent I'll probably waste. - Tug McGraw

I like the West. That's where men are men and women are women, and it's hard to beat a combination like that. - Milton Berle

There's a limit to how many times you can read how great you are and what an inspiration you are, but I'm not there yet. - Randy Pausch

Can't figure women. Sometimes they're afraid of a spider, other times they're not afraid to stand right up to the devil. - Donal Harding