Redneck Manicure

Show me where to put my John Hancrock. - Archie Bunker

We're going to show you some fun homework. - Mike Johanns

Show me a hero and I'll write you a tragedy. - F Scott Fitzgerald

See you later, alligator. After a while, crocodile. - Bill Haley

The Bunkers is going down to Florida as pre-deranged. - Archie Bunker

Don't tell me about your effort. Show me your results. - Tim Fargo

Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle. - Bob Hope

We'd show an Alzheimer's survivor here, if there were one. - Unknown

Life is a game show where the people who enjoy it are the winners. - Orson Bean

Show me a good and gracious loser and I'll show you a failure. - Knute Rockne

I'm Southern, so alligator tail is pretty interesting and yummy. - LeAnn Rimes

Show me the right path, O Lord; point out the road for me to follow. - Bible

If you wish to be loved, show more of your faults than your virtues. - E R Bulwer-Lytton

To be successful in show business, all you need are fifty good breaks. - Walter Matthau

Don't taunt the alligator until after you've crossed the creek. - Dan Rather

If my films don't show a profit, I know I'm doing something right. - Woody Allen

Show me a good loser and I'll show you a man playing golf with his boss. - Unknown

An appeaser is one who feeds a crocodile - hoping that it will eat him last. - Winston Churchill

There's a good animal show on with that kindly old gent, Marlons Perkos. - Archie Bunker

Borrowed thoughts, like borrowed money, only show the poverty of the borrower. - Lady Marguerite Blessington

There's so little money in my bank account, my scenic checks show a ghetto. - Phyllis Diller

Show me a man with a tattoo and I'll show you a man with an interesting past. - Jack London

Statistics show that of those who contract the habit of eating, very few survive. - Wallace Irwin

Don't tell me the moon is shining; show me the glint of light on broken glass. - Anton Chekhov

There are two things that Jack Bauer never does. Show mercy, and go to the bathroom. - Kiefer Sutherland

Men show their characters in nothing more clearly than in what they think laughable. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

Knowledge is like underwear. It is useful to have it, but not necessary to show it off. - Bill Murray

There are a lot of things happening that show us that this, right now, is a time to love. - Stevie Wonder

I chose the Egyptian dream: the dream to make a TV show, and then be called an infidel by the end. - Bassem Youssef

Show me a man with both feet firmly on the ground, and I'll show you a man who can't get his pants off. - Unknown

Show me a person who likes to go to meetings, and I'll show you a person who doesn't have enough to do. - Unknown

Show me anyone who's lived to over seventy, and you show me a fighter - someone who's got the will to live. - Agatha Christie

Nobody wants to show you the hours and hours of becoming. They'd rather show you the highlight of what they've become. - Angela Duckworth

Thousands and thousands of guys applied to be on the show... Some of them were crazy. Some of them were so much into themselves. - Donald Trump

Loving ourselves allows us to show up in the world so we can love others, uplift others, and make the world a more loving place. - Troy Love

My father was a baker and a lot of people do what their families did and I could have done that but I wanted to stay in show business. - Christopher Walken

NASA's robot Curiosity landed on Mars. Early pictures show no signs of ESPN or beer. This makes it very clear that men are not from Mars. - Unknown

Nothing's as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families. - Tim Allen

I love working for myself from home. I get along with everyone in the office; I can show up in pajamas, and I always win Employee of the Month. - Missy Miwac

Wit is the key, I think, to anybody's heart. Show me the person who doesn't like to laugh and I'll show you a person with a toe tag. - Julia Roberts