#1 humor site on the 'net

Run Down Apartments

Exercise at the highest level

Run Down Apartments thanks to Diane Baugh

High altitude training for the Summer Olympics

QuotaBills
Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit. - Phyllis Diller

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Inflation: everyone's illusion of wealth - Unknown

Didn't he take the exercise tax off cars? - Archie Bunker

A critic is a legless man who teaches running. - Channing Pollock

Reading is to the mind what exercise is to the body. - Joseph Addison

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

I often take exercise. Only yesterday I had breakfast in bed. - Oscar Wilde

Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith

If at first you don't succeed, you're running about average. - Unknown

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

Running is the best way to remind yourself how much you love sitting. - Bill Murray

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland

Middle age is when you are not inclined to exercise anything but caution. - Arthur Murray

After exercising I always eat pizza... just kidding. I don't exercise. - Unknown

Wouldn't exercise be more fun if calories screamed while you burned them? - Bill Murray

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

It was amazing I won. I was running against peace and prosperity and incumbency. - George W. Bush

The bird, the bee, the running child are all the same to the sliding glass door. - Demetri Martin

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. - Unknown

Animation is like running a marathon, and making a movie is like a 100 meter sprint. - Marjane Satrapi

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. - Marsha Doble

You can outdistance that which is running after you, but not what is running inside you. - Rwandan Proverb

My own prescription for health is less paperwork and more running barefoot through the grass. - Leslie Grimutter

If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction. - Dietrich Bonhoeffer

I love running. I’m not into marathons, but I am into avoiding problems at an accelerated rate. - Jarod Kintz

Back in my rummy days, I would tremble and shake for hours upon arising. It was the only exercise I got. - WC Fields

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Sometimes people don't want to hear the truth because they don't want their illusions destroyed. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Dreams or illusions, call them what you will, they lift us from the commonplace of life to better things. - Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

I exercise at least five times a week with stretching, Pilates, push-ups, planks, sit-ups, squats and light weights. - Reba McEntire

Being President is a lot like running a cemetery. You've got a lot of people under you and nobody's listening. - Bill Clinton

"Exercise" is such a dirty word in my household that whenever I even think of it, I wash my mouth out with chocolate. - Leonore Fleischer

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

I've seen so many young men over the years who think they're running at other young men. They are not. They are running at me. - Markus Zusak

The music that really turns me on is either running toward God or away from God. Both recognize the pivot, that God is at the center of the jaunt. - Bono


British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women

Redneck Dent Repair

Cocktail Shirt

Mega Samurai Sudoku Puzzles

Boy George or Boy Gorge?

Tall Guy Bike