#1 humor site on the 'net

Run Down Apartments

Exercise at the highest level

Run Down Apartments thanks to Diane Baugh

High altitude training for the Summer Olympics

QuotaBills
Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

My idea of exercise is a good brisk sit. - Phyllis Diller

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Eat right, exercise regularly, die anyway. - Unknown

Of all the 36 alternatives, running away is best. - Chinese Proverb

I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me. - Mark Twain

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party. - Robin Williams

Canada is not the party. Its the apartment above the party. - Craig Ferguson

I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting. - Mark Twain

Maybe I oughta get one of them priests in to exercise with her. - Archie Bunker

Gossip is just news running ahead of itself in a red satin dress. - Liz Smith

Motivation is the fuel, necessary to keep the human engine running. - Zig Ziglar

Some of my best friends are illusions. Been sustaining me for years. - Sheila Ballantyne

If at first you don't succeed, you're running about average. - Unknown

Whenever I feel the need to exercise, I lie down until it goes away. - Paul Terry

The way my luck is running, if I was a politician I'd be honest. - Rodney Dangerfield

Every time I feel like exercise, I lie down until the feeling passes. - Robert Hutchins

Running is an unnatural act, except from enemies and to the bathroom. - Unknown

The way to make money is to buy when blood is running in the streets. - John D. Rockefeller

A man loses his illusions first, his teeth second, and his follies last. - Helen Rowland

Exercise is king, nutrition is queen. Put them together and you have a kingdom. - Jack LaLanne

I was in the ROTC. Of course, ROTC stood for "Running off to Canada." - Jay Leno

I installed a skylight in my apartment. The people who live above me are furious. - Steven Wright

There is no exercise better for the heart than reaching down and lifting people up. - Unknown

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

There are men running governments who shouldn't be allowed to play with matches. - Will Rogers

If you fall out of that window and break both your legs, don't come running to me. - Groucho Marx

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing. - Marsha Doble

I object to people running down the future. I intend to live the rest of my life there. - Charles F Kettering

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Attachment is the great fabricator of illusions; reality can be attained only by someone who is detached. - Simone Weil

When governments become large, voters cannot exercise close oversight, otherwise known as political power. - Maggie Gallagher

Fantasy is an exercise bicycle for the mind. It might not take you anywhere, but it tones up the muscles that can. - Terry Pratchett

If you're skinny and you can't play hockey in Canada, you aren't left with a lot of options. I was left with running. - Malcolm Gladwell

Running! If there's any activity happier, more exhilarating, more nourishing to the imagination, I can't imagine what it might be. - Joyce Carol Oates

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins


Tank Top Security

One Beer A Day

Tennis Hammock

Fare Dodger

Husband of the Year

Bolder Boulder

Shoe Stop

Exactly How I Feel

Circle Of Life

Outback Waterhole

Next Week Plans

Cycle Feeding Your Cows

The Fall Of Adam

John The Baptist Souvenirs

Boat Hurdles

Bread Slice

Steak Sale

Take Away Food

Creative Vandalism

History Doesn't Repeat Itself

Flamingo Predator

Irish Pub Restroom

Like This

Instant Engine Starting Down Under