Swine Flew

Love is a grave mental disease. - Plato

If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? - George Carlin

Disease is the retribution of outraged nature. - Hosea Ballou

When you wallow with pigs, expect to get dirty. - Unknown

A dreaded disease is infilteratin' our home - Archie Bunker

When you treat a disease, first treat the mind. - Chen Jen

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Three out of four doctors recommend another doctor. - Graffito

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running. - Groucho Marx

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

Your fences need to be horse-high, pig-tight, and bull-strong. - Unknown

Chiropractor: A Doctor who works his fingers to the bone - yours - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Nationalism is an infantile disease. It is the measles of mankind. - Albert Einstein

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

The best way to reduce the cost of medical care is to reduce the illness. - Arlen Specter

No disease that can be treated by diet should be treated by any other means. - Maimonides

Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley

Pigs had just officially sprouted wings and were flying alongside airplanes. - Jennifer L Armentrout

Oh, when I was a kid, I was ugly. When I was born, the doctor smacked my mother. - Rodney Dangerfield

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

All of us are guinea pigs in the laboratory of God. Humanity is just a work in progress. - Tennessee Williams

To cure the British disease with socialism was like trying to cure leukemia with leeches. - Margaret Thatcher

I've just become a pensioner so I've started saving up for my own hospital trolley. - Tom Baker

Disease is war with the laws of our being, and all war, as a great general has said, is hell. - Lewis G. Janes

As it takes two to make a quarrel, so it takes two to make a disease, the microbe and its host. - Charles V. Chapin

The good physician treats the disease; the great physician treats the patient who has the disease. - William Osler

When you’re a nurse you know that every day you will touch a life or a life will touch yours. - Unknown

The Christian's Bible is a drug store. Its contents remain the same, but the medical practice changes. - Mark Twain

Working mothers are guinea pigs in a scientific experiment to show that sleep is not necessary to human life. - Unknown

'Tis not always in a physician's power to cure the sick; at times the disease is stronger than trained art. - Ovid

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

Pride: 1. A disease that makes everyone sick but the one who has it; 2. Pride is what we have - vanity is what others have. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

Only one rule in medical ethics need concern you: that action on your part which best conserves the interest of your patient. - Martin H. Fischer

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

I recently went to a new doctor and noticed he was located in something called the Professional Building. I felt better right away. - George Carlin

The difference between involvement and commitment is like an eggs and ham breakfast: the chicken was involved, the pig was committed. - Unknown

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield

Hastiness and superficiality are the psychic diseases of the 20th century, and more than anywhere else this disease is reflected in the press. - Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn