Wall Parkade

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

There is Jackson, standing like a stone wall. - Bernard Bee

You want me on that wall, you need me on that wall! - Jack Nicholson

I put hardwood floors on top of wall-to-wall carpet. - Steven Wright

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

I had to stop driving my car for a while - the tires got dizzy. - Steven Wright

The new job of art is to sit on the wall and get more expensive. - Robert Hughes

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

I made a killing on Wall Street a few years ago. I shot my broker. - Groucho Marx

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car. - Carrie Snow

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

I've exercised with women so thin that buzzards followed them to their cars. - Erma Bombeck

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it's either a new car or a new wife. - Prince Philip

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

The dent in his car is hardly cold and he's coming over here to claim his pound of fish. - Archie Bunker

Yesterday I parked my car in a tow-away zone... when I came back the entire area was missing. - Steven Wright

Most of us can read the writing on the wall; we just assume it's addressed to someone else. - Ivern Ball

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

A moose is an animal with horns on the front of its head and a hunting lodge wall on the back of it. - Groucho Marx

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for ten minutes. - Homer Simpson

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

When walking, you see things that you miss in a motor car or on the train. You give your mind space to ponder. - Tom Hodgkinson

Wall Street is the only place that people ride to in a Rolls Royce to get advice from those who take the subway. - Warren Buffet

Life's golden age is when the children are too old to need babysitters and too young to borrow the family car. - Unknown

I hooked up my accelerator pedal in my car to my brake lights. I hit the gas, people behind me stop, and I'm gone. - Steven Wright

Anyone who thinks sitting in church can make you a Christian must also think that sitting in a garage can make you a car. - Garrison Keillor

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz