Box Car

Chop your own path. Get off the car track. - A.Y. Jackson

Yacht: a floating box you throw money into. - Unknown

Chop your own wood, and it will warm you twice. - Henry Ford

Traffic signals in New York are just rough guidelines. - David Letterman

Auto racing began 5 minutes after the second car was built. - Henry Ford

Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck

Wood burns faster when you have to cut and chop it yourself. - Harrison Ford

The beaten path is the safest, but the traffic's terrible. - Jeff Taylor

I look at this life as a puzzle without all the pieces in the box. - Jonathan A. Burkett

To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior". - Rita Rudner

Americans will put up with anything provided it doesn't block traffic. - Dan Rather

A private railroad car is not an acquired taste. One takes to it immediately. - Eleanor R. Belmont

You know you're a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn't. - Jeff Foxworthy

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

You don't have to carry a designer bag that costs more than a car to look cool. - Kesha

The lead car is absolutely unique, except for the one behind it which is identical. - Murray Walker

Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys. - P.J. O'Rourke

A suburban mother's role is to deliver children obstetrically once, and by car forever after. - Peter DeVries

I went to a 7-11 and asked for a 2x4 and a box of 3x5's. The clerk said, "ten-four." - Steven Wright

Marriage has no guarantees. If that's what you're looking for, go live with a car battery. - Erma Bombeck

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

I replaced the headlights in my car with strobe lights, so it looks like I'm the only one moving. - Steven Wright

Standing in the middle of the road is very dangerous; you get knocked down by traffic from both sides. - Margaret Thatcher

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

Our ideas, like orange-plants, spread out in proportion to the size of the box which imprisons the roots. - Edward Bulwer Lytton

The wireless music box has no imaginable commercial value. Who would pay for a message sent to nobody in particular? - David Sarnoff

If you don't get out of the box you've been raised in, you won't understand how much bigger the world is. - Angelina Jolie

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I do get scared of the dentist, so a drive-through dentist might make me feel more at home. If I got to stay in my car. - Jessica Pare

I'm not a car guy. The subway gets me where I need to go efficiently and cheaply, and I don't worry about traffic. - Joe Scarborough

On my income tax 1040 it says, "Check this box if you are blind." I wanted to put a check mark about three inches away. - Tom Lehrer

It is amazing how quickly the kids learn to drive a car, yet are unable to understand the lawn mower, snowblower and vacuum cleaner. - Ben Bergor

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

My son really has the spirit of Valentine's Day. When he was in college, he used to send his mother a heart-shaped box of laundry. - Milton Berle

A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad. - Theodore Roosevelt

If the "black box" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole airplane made out of that stuff? - George Carlin

A car hits a Jewish man. The paramedic rushes over and says, "Are you comfortable?" The guy says, "I make a good living." - Henny Youngman

When I get real bored, I like to drive downtown and get a great parking spot, then sit in my car and count how many people ask me if I'm leaving. - Steven Wright

Some primal termite knocked on wood,
And tasted it, and found it good;
That is why your Cousin May
Fell through the parlor floor today. - Ogden Nash

I'm always tinkering with something - suddenly I'll think I can work with wood, but then I'll realize I can't, so I go back to sewing. - Melissa McCarthy