British Gas Meter

Money often costs too much. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Bloods’ not thicker than money. - Groucho Marx

A fool and his money are soon elected. - Will Rogers

He was not only a bore; he bored for England. - Malcolm Muggeridge

Love flies out the door when money comes innuendo. - Groucho Marx

When it comes to corruption, nothing succeeds like money. - American Proverb

A woman's best protection is a little money of her own. - Clare B Luce

We have the best government in the world... that money can buy. - Mark Twain

Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau. - Irving Fisher

A woman will buy anything she thinks the store is losing money on. - Kin Hubbard

Being rich is better than being poor, if only for financial reasons. - Woody Allen

One dollar for eternal happiness? I'd be happier with the dollar. - Charles Montgomery Burns

How much money does it take to make a man happy? Just one more dollar. - John D Rockefeller

Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop. - Gertrude Stein

I am fiercely loyal to those willing to put their money where my mouth is. - Paul Harvey

You cannot spend your way out of recession or borrow your way out of debt. - Daniel Hannan

After I make a lot of money, I'll be able to afford running for office. - Christy Romano

If we were interested in making money, we wouldn’t have become teachers. - Robin Williams

Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? - George Carlin

Architect: One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money. - Ambrose Bierce

I spent a lot of my money on booze, birds and fast cars... the rest I squandered. - George Best

Politics has become so expensive that it takes a lot of money even to be defeated. - Will Rogers

Here lies the body of Jonathan Blake.
Stepped on the gas instead of the brake. - Jonathan Blake

Animation is like running a marathon, and making a movie is like a 100 meter sprint. - Marjane Satrapi

Money and success don't change people; they merely amplify what is already there. - Will Smith

The principal benefit acting has afforded me is the money to pay for my psychoanalysis. - Marlon Brando

They say love is more important than money. Have you tried paying your bills with a hug? - Dave Chapelle

In Las Vegas, a man said to his wife, "Give me the money I told you not to give me." - Henny Youngman

Money can't buy happiness. But, it can buy a chocolate, which is pretty much the same thing. - Hanako Ishii

Money won't buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. - Bill Vaughan

All right, let's not panic. I'll make the money by selling one of my livers. I can get by with one. - Homer Simpson

Always serve too much hot fudge sauce on hot fudge sundaes. It makes people overjoyed, and puts them in your debt. - Judith Olney

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A successful woman is one who can find such a man. - Lana Turner

I tell ya, my wife and I, we don't think alike. She donates money to the homeless, and I donate money to the topless. - Rodney Dangerfield

Economy is going without something you do want in case, perhaps, you should someday want something you probably won't want. - Anthony Hope

Retirement is like a long vacation in Vegas. The goal is to enjoy it to the fullest, but not so fully that you run out of money. - Jonathan Clements

In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of the citizens to give to the other. - Voltaire

Happiness, not money or prestige, should be regarded as the ultimate currency - the currency by which we take measure of our lives. - Tal Ben-Shahar

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump

The Cross! There, and there only though the deist rave, and the atheist, if Earth bears so base a slave; There and there only, is the power to save. - William Cowper