Cell Phone For Seniors

If the phone doesn't ring it's me. - Jimmy Buffett

Stop all the clocks, cut off the telephone. - W H Auden

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

I put my phone in airplane mode, but it's not flying. - Unknown

The Internet is a telephone system that's gotten uppity. - Clifford Stoll

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life. - Daniel F E Auber

I'm aging like fine wine. I'm getting complex and fruity. - Unknown

Well, if I called the wrong number, why did you answer the phone? - James Thurber

If it’s the Psychic Network, why do they need a phone number? - Robin Williams

Don't let aging get you down. It's too hard to get back up. - John Wagner

Forget aging. If you're six feet above ground, it's a good day. - Faith Hill

Most of life's great moments happen when your phone is in your pocket. - Unknown

Obscenity is whatever happens to shock some elderly and ignorant magistrate. - Bertrand Russell

Life is like looking for your phone. Most of the time it's in your hand. - Unknown

The key to successful aging is to pay as little attention to it as possible. - Judith Regan

Sure I'm for helping the elderly. I'm going to be old myself some day. - Lillian Carter

If we are a country committed to free speech, then why do we have phone bills? - Steven Wright

No matter how old you are, if a little kid hands you a toy phone, you answer it. - Dave Chappelle

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

That's the great thing about a tractor. You can't really hear the phone ring. - Jeff Foxworthy

I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile. Then walk into a pole. - Unknown

Mirror: A truthful reflector shunned by vampires, hypocrites and aging fashion models - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

A gorilla with a cellphone riding a bicycle is bound to generate some clever captions. - Steve Breen

We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress. - Will Rogers

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

Aging is the extraordinary process where you become the person you always should have been. - David Bowie

The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball. - Doug Larson

People are prisoners of their phones; that's why it's called a 'cell' phone. - Unknown

E-mails are letters, after all, more lasting than phone calls, even if many of them r 2 cursory 4 u. - Anna Quindlen

The elderly don't drive that badly; they're just the only ones with time to do the speed limit. - Jason Love

The main Facebook usage is so big. About 20 percent of the time people spend on their phone is on Facebook. - Mark Zuckerberg

Phonesia: The affliction of dialing a phone number and forgetting whom you were calling just as they answer - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I have this theory that chocolate slows down the aging process. It may not be true, but do I dare take the chance? - Unknown

Middle age is when you're sitting at home on a Saturday night and the telephone rings and you hope it isn't for you. - Ogden Nash

Telephone: An invention of the devil which abrogates some of the advantages of making a disagreeable person keep his distance. - Ambrose Bierce

Carry your courage in an easily accessible place, the way you do your cellphone or your wallet. Courage is the ultimate career move. - Anna Quindlen

She's so fat she's my two best friends. She wears stretch caftans. She's got more chins than the Chinese telephone directory. - Joan Rivers

If you were going to die soon and had only one phone call you could make, who would you call and what would you say? And why are you waiting? - Stephen Levine

Hypothesis: 1. First thing a Redneck teenager says to his father on the phone; 2. Hippo, horse; thesis, placing: putting something on a horse. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

This 'telephone' has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us. - Unknown