Frohe Weihnachten

Candy is dandy but liquor is quicker. - Ogden Nash

I owe it all to little chocolate doughnuts. - John Belushi

Seven days without chocolate makes one weak. - Unknown

Rich gifts wax poor when givers prove unkind. - William Shakespeare

Behind every good woman is a lot of chocolate. - Unknown

When no one understands you, chocolate is there. - Daniel Worona

Sometimes a girl's gotta have some chocolate. - Carrie Underwood

Life is too short not to order the bacon dessert. - George Takei

Chocolate: God's apology to women for periods. - Unknown

I'd give up chocolate but I'm not a quitter. - Unknown

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

Coffee and chocolate - the inventor of mocha should be sainted. - Cherise Sinclair

As a child, the only clear thought I had was "Get candy." - Jerry Seinfeld

Some say women are addicted to chocolate. I say we're merely loyal. - Cathy Guisewite

Those gifts are ever the most acceptable which the giver has made precious. - Ovid

Apple: Nutritious lunchtime dessert which children will trade for cupcakes. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Chocolate makes otherwise normal people melt into strange states of ecstasy. - John West

What you see before you, my friend, is the result of a lifetime of chocolate. - Katharine Hepburn

Some people are chocolate and sweets people. I love French fried. That and caviar. - Cameron Diaz

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

It's one of the greatest gifts you can give yourself, to forgive. Forgive everybody. - Maya Angelou

Happiness. Simple as a glass of chocolate or tortuous as the heart. Bitter. Sweet. Alive. - Joanne Harris

The greatest tragedies were written by the Greeks and Shakespeare... neither knew chocolate. - Sandra Boynton

One of the most important gifts we have in television - the ability to heal through laughter. - Soleil M Frye

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The great thing about candy is that it can't be spoiled by the adult world. Candy is innocent. - Rosecrans Baldwin

The good physician treats the disease; the great physician treats the patient who has the disease. - William Osler

The best of all gifts around any Christmas tree: the presence of a family all wrapped up in each other. - Bill Vaughan

If you want to know what a man's like, take a good look at how he treats his inferiors, not his equals. - J K Rowling

We are each given a limitless capacity to love and attain wisdom. The extent we use these gifts is our choice. - Anthony Douglas

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

Technology is a queer thing. It brings you great gifts with one hand, and it stabs you in the back with the other. - Carrie Snow

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Are you going to answer my questions, or do I have to whack you with a stick until delicious candy surprises fall out? - Molly Harper

When you're stressed, eat ice cream, cake, chocolate and sweets. Why? Because stressed spelled backwards is desserts. - Unknown

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Pride causes us to use our gifts as though they came from ourselves, not benefits received from God, and to usurp our benefactor's glory. - Bernard of Clairvaux