#1 humor site on the 'net

Hair Safety

Hard hat tags along for the ride

Hair Safety thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Long on hair, sort on brains. - French Proverb

The drowning man grips to his own hair. - Greek Proverb

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffett

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

You're only as good as your last haircut. - Fran Lebowitz

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

You can't compete with a six foot five man in a wig. - Shemar Moore

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

I don't consider myself bald. I'm simply taller than my hair. - Tom Sharp

I have little hair because my brain is so big it pushes the hair out. - Silvio Berlusconi

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

Your own safety is at stake when your neighbor's house is in flames. - Horace

I used to think I'd like less grey hair. Now I'd like more of it. - Richie Benaud

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton

Actually, I comb my hair quite often. Of course, I use an electric toothbrush. - Phyllis Diller

Jerry Ford is a nice guy, but he played too much football with his helmet off. - Lyndon Baines Johnson

I don't want a wig that looks like a wig; I want one that could pass for a weave. - Nicki Minaj

I'm not Irish. Just because I have red hair doesn't mean I'm a lucky charm. - Rebecca Mader

I can't disguise myself with a wig and dark glasses - the wheelchair gives me away. - Stephen Hawking

If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol

I get more distracted by hair or a really bad wig than I do costumes any day of the week. - Colleen Atwood

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

For three days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. - Johnny Carson

In any given moment we have two options: to step forward into growth or step back into safety. - Abraham Maslow

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

I love to put on a wig, a costume, inhabit a different world and be called something different. - Susan Egan

Too bad all the people who know how to run this country are busy running taxicabs or cutting hair. - George Burns

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

Individuality is either the mark of genius or the reverse. Mediocrity finds safety in standardization. - Frederick Crane

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

Our oldest son was trying to find himself for about a year. Then one day he got a haircut, and found himself. - Phil Callaway

Those who would give up essential liberty to purchase a little temporary safety, deserve neither liberty nor safety. - Benjamin Franklin

You really just want to know that somebody loves you for you. Sometimes you feel like an ATM machine with a wig on it. - Mariah Carey

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor

Faithfulness is essential to the character of a friend: without this there can be no safety in intimacy with and confidence in him. - Samuel Hopkins

As a travel writer I've specialized in gritty, fearful destinations, the kind of places that make a reader's hair stick on end. - Tahir Shah

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear

When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro


Overloaded Mailbox

Redneck Phone

Enjoy Fresh Air

Bread Board

Snaccident

Mini Bar

Frisbee Stopper

Redneck Sushi

Redneck's Lo-Tech Mobile Phone

Downchuck

Border Agent Alert

Cadillac Clearance

Leading By Example

Wired For Coffee

Cadillac Bike

Chip and Dip

Cat Couch Nap

Redneck Trophy Fish

Country Irony

'None Of The Above' Election Option

I've Got Your Back

Vintage Campers

Great Minds of History

But That Was Yesterday