#1 humor site on the 'net

I Want It All

When monkeys go bad

I Want It All thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
If you pay peanuts, you get monkeys. - James Goldsmith

Bonjour, you cheese-eating surrender monkeys. - Groundskeeper Willie

Trouble came - as trouble so often does - with a monkey. - Paul Collins

By trying often, the monkey learns to jump from the tree. - Cameroon Proverb

The surest way to make a monkey out of a man is to quote him. - Robert Benchley

Everything is improved by the judicious application of primates. - Chris Roberson

Well, yous 2 may have come from monkeys and bamboons, but not me. - Archie Bunker

If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? - George Carlin

Your mother's down there throwing a monkey wrench into the halls of justice. - Archie Bunker

It is even harder for the average ape to believe that he has descended from man. - H L Mencken

The question is this: Is man an ape or an angel? I am on the side of the angels. - Benjamin Disraeli

I believe that our Heavenly Father invented man because he was disappointed in the monkey. - Mark Twain

An ape is an ape, a varlet's a varlet
Though clothed in silk or clothed in scarlet. - Spanish Proverb

Humans need fantasy to be human. To be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape. - Terry Pratchett

It was really strange to see all these apes standing around eating popcorn, smoking, wearing sunglasses. - Estella Warren

Every time you feel yourself being pulled into other people's drama, repeat these words: Not my circus, not my monkeys. - Polish Proverb

I am quite sure now that often in matters concerning religion and politics, a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkeys. - Mark Twain

The monkeys solved the puzzle simply because they found it gratifying to solve puzzles. They enjoyed it. The joy of the task was its own reward. - Daniel H. Pink


Saddle Surprise

Politicians Be Like

Senior Aerobics

Foiled Again

Redneck Beer Hunter

Pair Produce

Potting Pot

Ice Cream Burqa

Dog Soother

Fourk

Women's Outhouse

Crocodile Floor

Hummer Carriage

Antler Switch Plate

Redneck Cotter Pin

Redneck Bulldozer

Your Fly Is Down

Chili Rub

Tire Rotation

Political Promise Hauler

Steering Wheel For Couples

Confined By Walls

Moon Descent

Redneck Selfie Stick