#1 humor site on the 'net

Swim-In

Olympic swimmer's final thoughts: 'I’ve been framed!'

Swim-In thanks to Wally Zatylny

QuotaBills
Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so. - Douglas Adams

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

This is the place to be - in the land of swimming pools. - David Hockney

What a strange illusion to suppose that beauty is goodness. - Leo Tolstoy

You will never get lessons on swimming from a drowning man. - Unknown

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

Illusion is the dust the devil throws in the eyes of the foolish. - Minna Antrim

The man who is swimming against the stream knows the strength of it. - Woodrow Wilson

Our separation from each other is an optical illusion of consciousness. - Albert Einstein

Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly. - Morticia Addams

It's only when the tide goes out that you learn who's been swimming naked. - Warren Buffet

The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place. - George Bernard Shaw

Like the cosmetics industry, the securities business is engaged in selling illusion. - Paul Samuelson

I have often wanted to drown my troubles, but I can't get my wife to go swimming. - Jimmy Carter

The greatest obstacle to discovery is not ignorance - it is the illusion of knowledge. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure. - Scott Adams

We live in a fantasy world, a world of illusion. The great task in life is to find reality. - Irish Murdoch

I guess you would say I'd be like the Michael Phelps of swimming if he wasn't there. - Ryan Lochte

The illusion that the times that were are better than those that are has probably pervaded all ages. - Horace Greeley

What if everything is an illusion and nothing exists? In that case, I definitely overpaid for my carpet. - Woody Allen

Many people cycle or swim to keep trim. But if swimming is so good for the figure, how do you explain whales? - Charles Saatchi

Love easily confuses us because it is always in flux between illusion and substance, between memory and wish, between contentment and need. - Tom Robbins


No Beatle Haircuts

Lego Anatomy

His First Hot Rod

Hair Safety

Open Air Reader

Vacation At Last

Cutting Edge Delivery

Sunset Eclipse

Diet Swing

Lamp Escape

Strong Straws

Lucky Spectator

Breadlace

I Think I'll Hold It

Instant Coffee Tragedy

Cow Camouflage

Room For Two

Neandertallica

Key-o-Saurus

Pure Maple Syrup

Dentist Drill

Wife Consumption

Dog Proctologist

Vintage Birth Control