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Little Johnny's on a roll

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Success is the child of audacity. - Benjamin Disraeli

Children make your life important. - Erma Bombeck

It takes a whole village to raise a child. - African Proverb

I would rather sleep in a bathroom than in another hotel. - Billy Wilder

Endangered forests are being slaughtered for toilet paper. - Daphne Zuniga

Don't handicap your children by making their lives easy. - Robert H. Heinlein

Love is the child of illusion and the parent of disillusion. - Miguel de Unamuno

Vaseball: A game of catch played by children in the living room - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

To a child's ear, 'mother' is magic in any language. - Arlene Benedict

No matter how bad a child is, he is still good for a tax deduction. - American Proverb

All kids are gifted: some just open their packages earlier than others. - Michael Carr

Women should not have children after 35. Really? 35 children is enough. - Bill Murray

I am married to Beatrice Salkeld, a painter. We have no children, except me. - Brendan Behan

The four stages of man are infancy, childhood, adolescence, and obsolescence. - Art Linkletter

Kidney: 1. Midpoint of a child's leg; 2. An organ used to convert beer into urine. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home. - Phyllis Diller

A perfect parent is a person with excellent child-rearing theories and no actual children. - Dave Barry

Music Lover: A man, who upon hearing a soprano in the bathroom, puts his ear to the keyhole - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Castro couldn't even go to the bathroom unless the Soviet Union put the nickel in the toilet. - Richard M Nixon

At a formal dinner party, the person nearest death should always be seated closest to the bathroom. - George Carlin

When it comes to raising children, I believe in give and take. I give orders and they take ‘em. - Bernie Mac

When I was a little kid we had a sand box. It was a quicksand box. I was an only child... eventually. - Steven Wright

The best way to give advice to your children is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it. - Harry S Truman

If a child, a spouse, a life partner, or a parent depends on you and your income, you need life insurance. - Suze Orman

I've enjoyed many camping holidays with my sister and her children, but we're pretty posh campers. - Erin O'Connor

The legacy I want to leave is a child-care system that says no kid is going to be left alone or left unsafe. - Marian Wright Edelman

I look back on my childhood and thank the stars above. For everything you gave me, but mostly for your love. - Wayne F Winters

Here lies my past.
Good-bye I have kissed it;
Thank you, kids.
I wouldn’t have missed it. - Ogden Nash

Somewhere on this globe, every ten seconds, there is a woman giving birth to a child. She must be found and stopped. - Sam Levenson

I am afraid we must make the world honest before we can honestly say to our children that honesty is the best policy. - George Bernard Shaw

There's nothing that can help you understand your beliefs more than trying to explain them to an inquisitive child. - Frank A. Clark

You've probably got a device on you that can shoot decent video, so what's stopping you? Capture and share some moments. - Steve Garfield

Nobody can do for little children what grandparents do. Grandparents sort of sprinkle stardust over the lives of little children. - Alex Haley

We've got to work to save our children and do it with full respect for the fact that if we do not, no one else is going to do it. - Dorothy Height

Men who consistently leave the toilet seat up secretly want women to get up to go the bathroom in the middle of the night and fall in. - Rita Rudner

When nature is my inspiration and subject, I am witness to an extraordinary range of color and every imaginable atmospheric condition. - Karen Casey

It is not what you do for your children, but what you have taught them to do for themselves, that will make them successful human beings. - Ann Landers

Education commences on the mother's knee, and every word spoken within hearsay of little children tends toward the formation of character. - Hosea Ballou

My wife was a make-up artist, and she's a total product junkie. Our bathroom is packed full of lotions and potions so I end up trying them out. - Robert Carlyle

Rather than pushing children to think like adults, we might do better to remember that they are great learners and to try harder to be more like them. - Seymour Papert


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