QuotaBillsEvery dog has his day. - Unknown
When all else fails take a nap. - Unknown
Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown
A hard dog to keep on the porch. - Hillary Clinton
Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe
Subwoofer: A dog who scuba dives - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato
An angry dog is best led by its tail. - Unknown
The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown
Friccastewing a chicken on the hotplate - Archie Bunker
A dog in desperation will leap over a wall. - Unknown
The dog represents all that is best in man. - Etienne Charlet
Get the hanging dog expression off your face. - Archie Bunker
He who lies down with dogs, rises with fleas. - English Proverb
If you want a friend in Washington, get a dog. - Harry S Truman
Don't think to hunt two hares with one dog. - Benjamin Franklin
A good bone does not always come to a good dog. - French Proverb
Light Sleeper: Someone who naps on the chandelier - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Dogs got personality. Personality goes a long way. - Quentin Tarantino
Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman
I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers
I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright
One trained dog equals 60 search-and-rescue workers. - Charles Stoehr
If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb
Colliefornia: The American state that has gone to the dogs - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman
If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney
When the hares have all been caught, the hunting dogs are cooked. - Laozi
I have nothing against dogs. I just hate rugs that go squish-squish. - Phyllis Diller
We better not, ya know, kill our chickens before they cross the road. - Archie Bunker
If you want chicken soup, you've got to put a chicken in the pot. - Joe Segal
The quickest way to become an old dog is to stop learning new tricks. - John Rooney
Anybody who doesn't know what soap tastes like never washed a dog. - Franklin P Jones
A dog has lots of friends because he wags his tail and not his tongue. - Unknown
To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley
If I could be half the person my dog is, I'd be twice the human I am. - Unknown
The best comfort food will always be greens, cornbread, and fried chicken. - Maya Angelou
Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly
I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner
The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope
Diplomacy is the art of saying, "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock. - Will Rogers
Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries
Don't accept your dog's admiration as conclusive evidence that you are wonderful. - Ann Landers
It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray
Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill
A dog teaches a boy fidelity, perseverance, and to turn around three times before lying down. - Robert Benchley
Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein
I unfortunately still crave chicken McNuggets and bacon, which is the meat candy of the world. - Katy Perry
I have to tell them that last night was a shameful train wreck filled with blind cuddly puppies. - Charlie Sheen
Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend.
Inside of a dog it's too dark to read. - Groucho Marx
My brother thinks he's a chicken.
We don't talk him out of it because we need the eggs. - Groucho Marx
If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno
I think I'm going to keep my Irish accent forever now in any movie I make, because chicks dig it. - Chris O'Dowd
Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump
There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino
America is a large, friendly dog in a very small room. Every time it wags its tail, it knocks over a chair. - Arnold Toynbee
Ever wonder where you'd end up if you took your dog for a walk and never once pulled back on the leash? - Robert Brault
When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart
There is more refreshment and stimulation in a nap, even of the briefest, than in all the alcohol ever distilled. - Ovid
Any processed chicken from any place - I'll order it in a heartbeat. I'm very picky about my pork, though. - David Chang
We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet, so we bought a dog. It's cheaper and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner
I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray
My girlfriend's dog died. So I got her an identical one. She was livid; 'What am I going to do with two dead dogs?' - Gary Delaney
If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead
Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman
The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden
Snap-On Gasket Scrapper: Theoretically useful as a sandwich tool for spreading mayonnaise; used mainly for getting dog-doo off your boot - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz
Dogs display reluctance and wrath
If you try to give them a bath;
They bury bones in hideaways
And half the time they trot sideaways. - Ogden Nash