Bald Plug

A wig is a wig is a wig. - Billy Zane

Long on hair, sort on brains. - French Proverb

The drowning man grips to his own hair. - Greek Proverb

Never ask the barber if you need a haircut. - Warren Buffett

Even the worst haircut eventually grows out. - Lisa Kogan

A hair on the head is worth two on the brush. - Oliver Herford

You're only as good as your last haircut. - Fran Lebowitz

Can't act. Can sing. Balding. Can dance a little. - MGM Executive

I feel old when I see mousse in my opponent's hair. - Andre Aggassi

There's one good thing about being bald: it's neat. - Milton Berle

Let the wind blow through your hair while you still have some. - Dave Weinbaum

He doesn't dye his hair, he's just prematurely orange. - Gerald Ford

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum. - P G Wodehouse

I really mustache you a question... but I'll shave it for later. - Unknown

If truth is beauty, how come no one has their hair done in the library? - Lily Tomlin

If I want to knock a story off the front page, I just change my hairstyle. - Hillary Clinton

You can't play hockey with a bald spot, so I'm hanging up the skates. - Joe Sakic

I knew I was going bald when it was taking longer and longer to wash my face. - Harry Hill

As long as I can wear a wig I can be any character, and in real life I can be myself. - Ginnifer Goodwin

As a child, I always chose a false nose and some face paint and a wig for my birthday. - Ashley Jensen

A celebrity is anyone who looks like he spends more than two hours working on his hair. - Steve Martin

I can't disguise myself with a wig and dark glasses - the wheelchair gives me away. - Stephen Hawking

When I was with Andy Warhol, I thought, 'God, his wig looks cheaper than mine!' - Dolly Parton

A man can be short and dumpy and getting bald, but if he has fire, women will like him. - Mae West

If you wear a wig, everybody notices. But if you then dye the wig, people notice the dye. - Andy Warhol

Whether you're a man or not comes from your heart, not how much hair you have on your head. - Bruce Willis

Middle age is when your classmates are so grey and wrinkled and bald they don't recognize you. - Bennett Cerf

Forget not that the earth delights to feel your bare feet and the winds long to play with your hair. - Khalil Gibran

I benefit from the Mr. Potato Head syndrome. Put a wig and a nose and glasses on me, and I disappear. - Phil Hartman

I wanted to do something nice so I bought my mother-in-law a chair. Now they won't let me plug it in. - Henny Youngman

Many of us are at the 'metallic' age - gold in our teeth, silver in our hair, and lead in our pants. - Unknown

Men will confess to treason, murder, arson, false teeth, or a wig. How many of them will own up to a lack of humor? - Frank Colby

I want my kids to have the things in life that I never had when I was growing up. Things like beards and chest hair. - Jarod Kintz

Her capacity for family affection is extraordinary: when her third husband died, her hair turned quite gold from grief. - Oscar Wilde

Laundry's easier when you live alone. Fifteen minutes before a date, put 'em on, dry 'em with a hair blower. - Elayne Boosler

I wore a thong and a bra and a wig. Those things hurt. I mean, thongs? Like, they dig in. It takes a tough man to be a woman. - Hank Azaria

I'm acting when I serve as a hostess, when I run my wig business. I was born to act, and life itself is the greatest part. - Eva Gabor

Beauty isn't worth thinking about; what's important is your mind. You don't want a fifty-dollar haircut on a fifty-cent head. - Garrison Keillor

His mind is concrete and fastidious,
His nose is remarkably big;
His visage is more or less hideous,
His beard it resembles a wig. - Edward Lear

When I was six, I entered a talent contest. I dyed my hair blond, had a chainsaw and pretended I was Eminem. The old folk weren't expecting that. - Nico Mirallegro