#1 humor site on the 'net

Broccoli Tree House

Health food for a growing mind

Broccoli Tree House thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

QuotaBills
Love begins at home. - Mother Teresa

I look at Canada like a second home. - Prince Andrew

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

There are no elevators in the house of success. - H.H. Vreeland

Heaven is home. Utopia is here. Nirvana is now. - Edward Abbey

Home is any four walls that enclose the right person. - Helen Rowland

He's got that big house to maintain in San Clemency. - Archie Bunker

I just heard from Bill Bailey. He's not coming home. - Henny Youngman

God is at home, it's we who have gone out for a walk. - Meister Eckhart

Preoccupied with a single leaf you won't see the tree. - Vagabond

It's a sad house where the hen crows louder than the cock. - Scottish Proverb

I ordered a bed from IKEA and they sent me a tree trunk and a saw. - Eileen Curtright

It's very hard to make a home for a man if he's always in it. - Winifred Kirkland

I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man, I keep his house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

Census Taker: A man who goes from house to house increasing the population. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The fellow that owns his own home is always just coming out of a hardware store. - Kin Hubbard

All things that people take home from the store become part of their identities. - David Masten

Now that the House of Commons is trying to become useful, it does a great deal of harm. - Oscar Wilde

People say satire is dead. It's not dead; it's alive and living in the White House. - Robin Williams

A gentleman should never leave the house without a sharp knife, a good watch, and great hat. - Unknown

Shady Character: A fellow who snoozes in a hammock under a tree while his wife mows the lawn - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days. - Plautus

Liberate yourself today. At work or at home - you don't have to be how others expect you to be. - Elaine Harrison

My wife is on a diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost any weight, but she can sure climb a tree. - Henny Youngman

The Honourable Lady was once an egg and people on both sides of this House greatly regret its fertilisation. - Nicholas Fairbairn

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

Character is like a tree and reputation like a shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. - Abraham Lincoln

You can't be suspicious of a tree, or accuse a bird or a squirrel of subversion or challenge the ideology of a violet. - Hal Borland

My house is on the median strip of a highway. You don't really notice, except I have to leave the driveway doing 60 MPH. - Steven Wright

Over the years, I learned so much from mom. She taught me about the importance of home and history and family and tradition. - Martha Stewart

The most dangerous person of the world is a member of the United States Congress just home from a three-day fact-finding trip. - Johnny Isakson

I was born by Caesarian section... but not so you'd notice. It's just that when I leave a house, I go out through the window. - Steven Wright

I have an answering machine in my car. It says, "I'm home now. But leave a message and I'll call when I'm out." - Steven Wright

On the top of the Crumpetty Tree
The Quangle Wangle sat,
But his face you could not see,
On account of his Beaver Hat. - Edward Lear

The worst thing about work in the house or home is that whatever you do it is destroyed, laid waste or eaten within twenty-four hours. - Lady Hasluck

Home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever spoke, or spirit ever answers to, in the strongest conjuration. - Charles Dickens

The axe cannot boast of the tree it has cut down. It could do nothing but for the woodsman. He made it, he sharpened it, and he used it. - Samuel Brengel

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong

I love working for myself from home. I get along with everyone in the office; I can show up in pajamas, and I always win Employee of the Month. - Missy Miwac


Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer

Reflection

Plane Tennis

New IRS Form

Wisconsin Cheese

MAGA King

Baby Formula

When Gas Costs Too Much

Shoemobile

Salmon Street

Pandemic Treaty

People Of The River

SUV Sinkhole

Hope

Blonde's 710 Cover

Dragon Playground

Redneck Boat Ramp

Jack-A-Lope vs Jack-E-Lope

Urleen

Carry On or Carrion?

Selfie Pilot

Monarch Butterflies - Starting a Monarchy

Air Couch

Europe Road Trip