Joe-ks.com
#1 humor site on the 'net
Cornfield Fishing
What they use as bait is a trade secret
Harvesting Corn on the Cob in Iowa
Arkansas Fishing
A good old Arkansas boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says, “What you gonna do with that? There ain’t no water deep enough to float a boat within 100 miles of here.”
He says, “I won it and I’m a gonna keep it.”
His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees the wife and asks where his brother is.
She says, “He’s out there in his bass boat,” pointing to the field behind the house.
The brother heads out behind the house and sees his brother sitting in a bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand down in the middle of a big field. He yells out to him, “What are you doing?”
His brother replies, “I’m fishin. What does it look like I’m a doing.”
His brother yells, “It’s people like you that give people from Arkansas a bad name, makin everybody think we’re stupid. If I could swim, I’d come out there and whip your ass!”
A good old Arkansas boy won a bass boat in a raffle drawing. He brought it home and his wife looks at him and says, “What you gonna do with that? There ain’t no water deep enough to float a boat within 100 miles of here.”
He says, “I won it and I’m a gonna keep it.”
His brother came over to visit several days later. He sees the wife and asks where his brother is.
She says, “He’s out there in his bass boat,” pointing to the field behind the house.
The brother heads out behind the house and sees his brother sitting in a bass boat with a fishing rod in his hand down in the middle of a big field. He yells out to him, “What are you doing?”
His brother replies, “I’m fishin. What does it look like I’m a doing.”
His brother yells, “It’s people like you that give people from Arkansas a bad name, makin everybody think we’re stupid. If I could swim, I’d come out there and whip your ass!”
Fishing Show: Reel-life TV. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb
She stood in tears amid the alien corn. - John Keats
A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel
A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem
Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb
Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover
At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying
This is a truly international field - no Britons involved. - David Coleman
A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa
Habitat: Place where a particular species of fish was last week - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Corn can't expect justice from a court composed of chickens. - African Proverb
There is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem. - Booker T Washington
I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson
A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy
A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson
Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide
I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha
Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I could dominate the origami field. I think I have enormous potential in that area. - Jon Cryer
Fishing is not like billiards, in which it is possible to attain a disgusting perfection. - Arthur Ransome
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray
Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1. - C-3PO
The biggest battle is never on the field, the fairway, the diamond or rink: it's in your mind. - Carey Neuhoff
Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson
Grilling outside with my parents at the Jersey shore. We would grill lobster and corn in the summer. - Bobby Flay
It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen
The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score. - Bill Copeland
A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin
Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray
The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. - Dave Barry
He who learns the rules of wisdom without conforming to them in his life is like a man who plows in his field but does not sow. - Saadi
Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman
The quality of a man's life is in direct proportion to his commitment to excellence, regardless of his chosen field of endeavor. - Vince Lombardi Jr.
The quality of a person's life is directly proportional to his commitment to excellence, regardless of his chosen field of endeavor. - Vince Lombardi
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein
What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
There are plenty more fish in the sea. - English Proverb
She stood in tears amid the alien corn. - John Keats
A woman needs a man like a fish needs a net. - Cynthia Heimel
A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle. - Gloria Steinem
Love is a fair garden, and marriage a field of nettles. - Finnish Proverb
Be patient and calm; no one can catch a fish with anger. - Herbert Hoover
At high tide, fish eat ants; at low tide, ants eat fish. - Thai Saying
This is a truly international field - no Britons involved. - David Coleman
A sushi chef has to spot the best-quality fresh fish instantly. - Nobu Matsuhisa
Habitat: Place where a particular species of fish was last week - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Corn can't expect justice from a court composed of chickens. - African Proverb
There is as much dignity in tilling a field as in writing a poem. - Booker T Washington
I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson
A lawyer is an odd sort of fish, first rotten, then green, then ripe. - Robert Christy
A fishing rod is a stick with a hook at one end and a fool at the other. - Samuel Johnson
Fish die belly upward, and rise to the surface. Its their way of falling. - Andre Gide
I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge? - Douglas Adams
Fishing is boring, unless you catch an actual fish, and then it is disgusting. - Dave Barry
Don't be a fish; be a frog. Swim in the water and jump when you hit ground. - Kim Young-ha
Every man takes the limits of his own field of vision for the limits of the world. - Arthur Schopenhauer
I could dominate the origami field. I think I have enormous potential in that area. - Jon Cryer
Fishing is not like billiards, in which it is possible to attain a disgusting perfection. - Arthur Ransome
If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens? - Seymour Cray
Sir, the possibility of successfully navigating an asteroid field is approximately 3,720 to 1. - C-3PO
The biggest battle is never on the field, the fairway, the diamond or rink: it's in your mind. - Carey Neuhoff
Field hockey is my strongest sport, and if I lose a game, I take a long, hot bath and moan about it. - Emma Watson
Grilling outside with my parents at the Jersey shore. We would grill lobster and corn in the summer. - Bobby Flay
It is our art that has an opportunity to leave a footprint in the sand. They don't wrap fish in our work. - Hugh N Jacobsen
The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score. - Bill Copeland
A little House well fill'd, a little Field well till'd, and a little Wife well will'd, are great Riches. - Benjamin Franklin
Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens. - Bill Murray
The only kind of seafood I trust is the fish stick, a totally featureless fish that doesn't have eyeballs or fins. - Dave Barry
He who learns the rules of wisdom without conforming to them in his life is like a man who plows in his field but does not sow. - Saadi
Teach a man to fish and you feed him for a lifetime. Unless he doesn't like sushi, then you also have to teach him to cook. - Auren Hoffman
The quality of a man's life is in direct proportion to his commitment to excellence, regardless of his chosen field of endeavor. - Vince Lombardi Jr.
The quality of a person's life is directly proportional to his commitment to excellence, regardless of his chosen field of endeavor. - Vince Lombardi
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it was stupid. - Albert Einstein
What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin. - Dave Attell
I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo
9 Months On The Inside
Noah Called
The Mighty Stegosaurus
Get A Dog They Said
Are You Ready?
Down Day
Peddle Sewing Machine Sink
You Never Call
Dawntastic
Work Rules
Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers
Less Severe Inflation
Hotel Annex
King Stump
Diet Carbs
Home Made Limo
Cool Reading Room
Biggest Fan On The Block
Vintage Birth Control
Close Shave
Australian RV
Panorama Dog
Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation
Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer