#1 humor site on the 'net

Distressing Artwork

Animal pictures gone wrong

Distressing Artwork thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Self portrait delusion

QuotaBills
You gotta be kitten me. - Unknown

Curiosity killed the cat. - English Proverb

International Spade The Cat Week - Archie Bunker

Catacomb: A feline grooming tool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

All cats appear grey in the dark. - English Proverb

Meow means "woof" in cat. - George Carlin

When the cat dies, the mice rejoice. - African saying

A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. - Hazel Nicholson

First Aid Kit: A cat that works for the Red Cross. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat. - Leo Dworkin

Women's clothes: never wear anything that panics the cat. - P.J. O'Rourke

People that hate cats will come back as mice in their next life. - Faith Resnick

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

A dog is a man's best friend. A cat is a cat's best friend. - Robert J Vogel

At worst, a house unkept cannot be so distressing as a life unlived. - Rose Macaulay

It was a great interview process. They were fighting like cats and dogs. - Donald Trump

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

The trouble with a kitten is that when it grows up, it's always a cat. - Ogden Nash

I have never known any distress that an hour's reading did not relieve. - Charles de Montesquieu

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you. - Mary Bly

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. - Garrison Keillor

It doesn't matter if a cat is black or white, so long as it catches mice. - Deng Xiaoping

If you hold a cat by the tail you learn things you cannot learn any other way. - Mark Twain

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

When a man loves cats, I am his friend and comrade without further introduction. - Mark Twain

In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat. - Warren Eckstein

I was such an ugly kid. When I played in the sandbox, the cat kept covering me up. - Rodney Dangerfield

Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin' it back. - Will Rogers

Sleep is like my cat. I can call him by his name, but he still won't come to me. - Shane Koyczan

Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. - Jeff Valdez

I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals. - Winston Churchill

The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it. - Doug Larson

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

I chalk up the fact that I got diabetes to my body saying, 'Dude, you have been doing wrong for way too long!' - Randy Jackson

An actor is never so great as when he reminds you of an animal - falling like a cat, lying like a dog, moving like a fox. - Francois Truffaut

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

By adversity are wrought the greatest works of admiration, and all the fair examples of renown, out of distress and misery are grown. - Samuel Daniel

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright


Looking For Something?

Yellow Pet

Race Break

Fuse Bypass

Good Boy

British Tea Party

Roadside Assistance

Chair Boy

Cheers Beer

African Airstrip

Horsepower vs Torque

Filling Up Is OverRated

Flywood

Ukraine Aid

Handicap Motorcyclist

Auto Warranty: New Extend-ed Coverage

Messerschmitt

UNinvolved

Plane Oops!

Manitoba Home Security System

Outdoor Pool

Working From Home

Snowbound Train

Smirnoff Women