Genuine Fake Watches

Hot Time: A clock in an oven - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

What are imitation rhinestones? - Steven Wright

Anything that consoles is fake. - Iris Murdoch

It's 5 O'Clock Somewhere. - Jim Farley

That's a genuine fac-same-ully. - Archie Bunker

Genuine 100% chromonometer (a watch) - Archie Bunker

Extraordinary how potent cheap music is. - Noel Coward

Sympathy is a crutch. Never fake a limp. - Unknown

All bad poetry springs from genuine feeling. - Oscar Wilde

When everything gets answered, it's fake. - Sean Penn

Imitation is the sincerest form of television. - Fred Allen

How can I tell if humility is genuine or fake? - David J. Bobb

Always laugh when you can. It is cheap medicine. - Lord Byron

Tradition: A clock which tells what time it was. - Elbert Hubbard

Safety is a cheap and effective insurance policy. - Unknown

I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me. - Warren Buffett

To do just the opposite is also a form of imitation. - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

I was born to make mistakes, not to fake perfection. - Drake Edwards

Even a clock that does not work is right twice a day. - Polish Proverb

Rudeness if the weak man's imitation of strength. - Eric Hoffer

Rudeness is the weak man's imitation of strength. - Eric Hoffer

Don't watch the clock, do what it does. Keep going. - Sam Levenson

I thought talk was cheap until I saw our telephone bill. - Henny Youngman

Men often applaud an imitation, and hiss the real thing. - Aesop

The quickest way to know a woman is to go shopping with her. - Marcelene Cox

My fake plants died because I did not pretend to water them. - Mitch Hedberg

You can't turn back the clock. But you can wind it up again. - Bonnie Prudden

Of all ills that one endures, hope is a cheap and universal cure. - Abraham Cowley

You can't fake quality any more than you can fake a good meal. - William S. Burroughs

A good thing sells itself; a bad thing advertises itself for sale. - African Saying

Honesty is a very expensive gift. Don't expect it from cheap people. - Warren Buffett

Acting is all about honesty. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - George Burns

When it's three o'clock in New York, it's still 1938 in London. - Bette Midler

Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. - Sharon Stone

A genuine leader is not a searcher for consensus but a molder of consensus. - Martin Luther King

I've got all the money I'll ever need, if I die by four o'clock. - Henny Youngman

The calendar and the clock are all set by football season and the off-season. - Tom Coughlin

Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do. - Jean-Paul Sartre

I shall make electricity so cheap that only the rich can afford to burn candles. - Thomas Edison

When women are mad or depressed, they eat or go shopping. Men invade another country. - Elayne Boosler

Personal judgments are like watches; none go just the same, yet each believes his own. - Alexander Pope

A man with one watch knows what time it is. A man with two watches is never quite sure. - Lee Segall

Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping. - Bo Derek

Nothing in the world is ever completely wrong. Even a stopped clock is right twice a day. - Paulo Coelho

I can't turn the clock back but I can seek the forgiveness of those I've wronged. - Richard Coles

He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is. - Lou Duva

Shopping: The fine art of acquiring things you don't need with money you don't have. - Unknown

No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement. - Florida Scott-Maxwell

The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you've got it made. - Groucho Marx

Make pumpkin bread as the default gift for everyone. It is cheap, it is beloved, it is carbs. - Karen Bender

Genuine feelings cannot be produced, nor can they be eradicated. The body sticks to the facts. - Alice Miller

I've been asked to say a couple of words about my husband, Fang. How about short and cheap? - Phyllis Diller

No person can be a great leader unless he takes genuine joy in the successes of those under him. - W.A. Nance

I went to a garage sale. "How much for the garage?" "It's not for sale." - Steven Wright

Indian people, we are proud of our cheapness. You are never gonna insult us by calling us cheap. - Russell Peters

I like to put on a wig or a fake mustache and do something silly with friends, do a little dance. - Tom Lenk

I don't have an alarm clock. If someone needs to wake me up, then I have my BlackBerry next to me. - Mark Zuckerberg

Everything is for sale in Hollywood; the fairy tale, the costume, the pumpkin, the footman and the mice. - Amanda Eliasch

I refuse to believe in three things: cash, clock, and calendar. You should never be enslaved by these three. - Sharad Sagar

There's a lot of fake people in the world, but before you judge them, make sure you're not one of them. - Unknown

Women are the most powerful magnet in the universe. And all men are cheap metal. And we all know where north is. - Larry Miller

Give me a Murphy bed, a Lazy Susan, a grandfather clock and a bulldog, and I will show you the meaning of comedy. - Jonathan Goldstein

If human beings had genuine courage, they'd wear their costumes every day of the year, not just on Halloween. - Douglas Coupland

The biggest troublemaker you'll probably ever have to deal with, watches you from the mirror every mornin'. - Unknown

Without a sense of proportion there can be neither good taste nor genuine intelligence, no perhaps moral integrity. - Eric Hoffer

I would like to find a stew that will give me heartburn immediately, instead of at three o'clock in the morning. - John Barrymore

Middle age is when you're faced with two temptations and you choose the one that will get you home by nine o'clock. - Ronald Reagan

One of the simple but genuine pleasures in life is getting up in the morning and hurrying to a mouse trap you set the night before. - Kin Hubbard

When we associate with the virtuous we form ourselves in imitation of their virtues, or at least lose, every day, something of our faults. - Agapet

Two important things are to have a genuine interest in people and to be kind to them. Kindness, I've discovered, is everything in life. - Isaac Bashevis Singer