Hardworking Wife

Take my wife - please! - Henny Youngman

Fame is the perfume of heroic deeds. - Socrates

The best medicine is having a good wife. - Kin Hubbard

Fame is a fickle food upon a shifting plate. - Emily Dickinson

Compromises are for relationships, not wine. - Robert S Caywood

No man should plant more garden than his wife can hoe. - Old Saying

The secret to a happy marriage? Do what your wife tells you. - Denzel Washington

I take my wife everywhere, but she keeps finding her way back. - Henny Youngman

Behind every successful man is a woman. Behind her is his wife. - Groucho Marx

My wife is a sex object. Every time I ask for sex, she objects. - Les Dawson

The great myth of our times is that technology is communication. - Libby Larsen

A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband. - Ogden Nash

A bachelor is one who enjoys the chase but does not eat the game. - Unknown

Fame usually comes to those who are thinking about something else. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I don't really get romance. Bring me fish or moose, not flowers. - Eden Robinson

The best way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once. - E. Joseph Cossman

If you want to keep a secret, don't whisper in your wife's ear. - Amish Saying

The most important thing in communication is hearing what isn't said. - Peter F Drucker

The man who says his wife can't take a joke, forgets that she took him. - Oscar Wilde

Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson

The woman who can create her own job is the one who will win fame and fortune. - Amelia Earhart

All my wife wanted for Valentine's Day was a little card - American Express. - Milton Berle

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her. - Sacha Guitry

John Wooden was a hall of fame character long before he was a hall of fame coach. - John C Maxwell

My wife likes to talk on the phone during sex. She called me from Chicago last night. - Rodney Dangerfield

An almost perfect relationship with his father was the earthly root of all his wisdom. - C S Lewis

The easiest kind of relationship for me is with ten thousand people. The hardest is with one. - Joan Baez

I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with 28 years ago. - Will Rogers

A psychiatrist is a fellow who asks you a lot of expensive questions your wife asks for nothing. - Joey Adams

Talent is God-given. Be humble. Fame is man-given. Be thankful. Conceit is self-given. Be careful. - Harvey Mackay

Going without food or water will kill the body, but the lack of relationship will kill the minds and spirit. - David Jeremiah

A relationship without trust is like a car without gas. You can stay in it all you want, but it won't go anywhere. - Jay Shetty

Valentine's Day: Rubbing singles' noses in their lack of a mate and the noses of couples in their lack of time. - Emma McLaughlin

The main business of a lawyer is to take the romance, the mystery, the irony, the ambiguity out of everything he touches. - Antonin Scalia

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

Twenty years of romance make a woman look like a ruin, but twenty years of marriage make her something like a public building. - Oscar Wilde

One disadvantage of being a hog is that at any moment some blundering fool may try to make a silk purse out of your wife's ear. - J.B. Morton

With my wife I don't get no respect. I made a toast on her birthday to "the best woman a man ever had." The waiter joined me. - Rodney Dangerfield

This is a honeydew day. That is when you get a day off and the wife says, "Honey, do this," and "Honey, do that" around the house. - Jim Lemon