#1 humor site on the 'net

Milkshake Desweetener

Wisse prefers a White Spot milkshake

Milkshake Desweetener thanks to Pepijn Boomsluiter

Mixing drinks at The Old Spaghetti Factory, Whistler, B.C.

Milkshake Desweetener thanks to Pepijn Boomsluiter

QuotaBills
Sweet is a grief well ended. - Aeschylus

Love is the ultimate no-calorie sweetener. - Richelle E. Goodrich

Friendship is a plant we must often water. - German Proverb

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

Milk without fat is like nonalcoholic Scotch. - Andy Rooney

Why buy a cow if you can get the milk for free. - English Proverb

Sex is good, but not as good as fresh sweet corn. - Garrison Keillor

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

Like water, we are truest to our nature in repose. - Cyril Connolly

He was so good he would pour rose water on a toad. - Douglas Jerrold

You never miss the water till the well has run dry. - Irish Proverb

Things that were hard to bear are sweet to remember. - Lucius Annaeus Seneca

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

In Hollywood, a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk. - Rita Rudner

I know too well the poison and the sting of things too sweet. - Adelaide Proctor

Never cry over spilt milk, because it may have been poisoned. - WC Fields

I miss Irish milk. Probably not as much as Superquinn sausages. - Tristan MacManus

If his IQ slips any lower, we'll have to water him twice a day. - Molly Ivins

Where man sees but withered leaves, God sees sweet flowers growing. - Albert Laighton

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

Be a pineapple: stand tall, wear a crown, and be sweet on the inside. - Unknown

My wife's an earth sign. I'm a water sign. Together we make mud. - Henny Youngman

Why can't a woman be more like a dog, huh? So sweet, loving, attentive. - Kirk Douglas

When in doubt as to the applicability of a disinfectant, use soap and water. - Martin H. Fischer

Sweet words are like honey, a little may refresh, but too much gluts the stomach. - Anne Bradstreet

Life is a slice of watermelon: never without seeds but sweet 'til the bitter end. - Unknown

The dignity of movement of an iceberg is due to only one ninth of it being above water. - Ernest Hemingway

We should be as water, which is lower than all things yet stronger even than the rocks. - Sioux Proverb

The miracle is not to fly in the air, or to walk on the water, but to walk on the earth. - Chinese Proverb

I have a constant sweet tooth, so I like anything from the bakery, like cupcakes, cookies. - Carmen Electra

Before enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment: chop wood, carry water. - Zen Buddhist Saying

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

Success is sweet and sweeter if long delayed and gotten through many struggles and defeats. - Amos B Alcott

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

I asked the waiter, "Is this milk fresh?" He said, "Lady, three hours ago it was grass." - Phyllis Diller

I keep looking for one more teacher, only to find that fish learn from the water and birds learn from the sky. - Mark Nepo

The house smelled musty and damp, and a little sweet, as if it were haunted by the ghosts of long-dead cookies. - Neil Gaiman

Not all chemicals are bad. Without hydrogen and oxygen, for example, there would be no way to make water, a vital ingredient in beer. - Dave Barry

Canada is like an old cow. The West feeds it. Ontario and Quebec milk it. And you can well imagine what it's doing in the Maritimes. - Tommy Douglas

Iron rusts from disuse; stagnant water loses its purity and in cold weather becomes frozen; even so does inaction sap the vigor of the mind. - Leonardo da Vinci


Captain Literate

Fossilized Sid

Plenty Of Fish In The Sea

Husband Colors

Mac Supports Windows

Me First!

Latest Ukrainian Model

Chocolate Bath

Becoming A Cop

Handicap Swing

Lawn Aeration

Soup Of The Day

Black Eye

Teen Shoe

He Wants In

Who's Watching Whom?

Wine Glass Chair

Flight Change

No Feeding

How It's Done

Toad Selfie

Daily Rain Gauge

RSVP

France-Is Bacon