#1 humor site on the 'net

Perfectly Groomed Love Rug

Driving and shaving don't mix - unless you're a Redneck

Perfectly Groomed Love Rug thanks to Mike King

QuotaBills
All is fair in love and golf. - American Proverb

He would make a lovely corpse. - Charles Dickens

Love is being stupid together. - Paul Valery

Tests of love always end badly. - Melanie Thernstrom

Give all to love; obey thy heart. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

Where there is love there is life. - Mahatma Gandhi

Manners are love in a cool climate. - Quentin Crisp

I love stretching myself musically. - Liz Phair

Oh, that lovely title, ex-president. - Dwight D Eisenhower

Photography is a love affair with life. - Burk Uzzle

I love my rejection slips. They show me I try. - Sylvia Plath

A lot of people attack the sea. I make love to it. - Jacques Cousteau

I love a dog. He does nothing for political reasons. - Will Rogers

To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance. - Oscar Wilde

When love and skill work together, expect a masterpiece. - John Ruskin

He was afraid of defiling the love which filled his soul. - Leo Tolstoy

Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love. - Albert Einstein

I'm not addicted to coke, I just love the way it smells. - Richard Pryor

When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain. - Mark Twain

I love hiking, paddle boarding and listening to the Veronicas. - Bindi Irwin

Whatever you do, stamp out abuses, and love those who love you. - Voltaire

Love is something sent from heaven to worry the hell out of you. - Dolly Parton

I'd love to explain it to you, but I don't have any crayons. - Unknown

Men fall in love with their eyes. Women fall in love with their ears. - Dr. Phil McGraw

It takes more love to share the saddle than it does to share the bed. - Unknown

I only eat chocolate for you... so there'll be more of me to love! - Unknown

I want to be a healer, and love all things that grow and are not barren. - JRR Tolkien

In literature as in love, we are astonished at what is chosen by others. - Andre Maurois

I don't know that love changes. People change. Circumstances change. - Nicholas Sparks

Love wouldn't be blind if the braille weren't so damned much fun. - Armistead Maupin

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

To love to preach is one thing; to love to whom you preach is quite another. - D. Martin Lloyd-Jones

I write many essays on whales. I love whales, especially orcas. And dolphins. - Millie B. Brown

On stage I make love to twenty five thousand people; and then I go home alone. - Janis Joplin

Peace will come when the Arabs will love their children more than they hate us. - Golda Meir

The hunger for love is much more difficult to remove than the hunger for bread. - Mother Teresa

Want to improve your relationships? See love as a verb rather than as a feeling. - Stephen R. Covey

Don't feel stupid if you don't like what everyone else pretends to love. - Emma Watson

Your inner understanding of love can be extended beyond all you have ever known, before. - Eleesha

Let choice whisper in your ear and love murmur in your heart. Be ready, here comes life. - Unknown

We are all pencils in the hand of a writing God, who is sending love letters to the world. - Mother Teresa

Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind, And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind. - William Shakespeare

It isn't enough for you to love money - it's also necessary that money should love you. - Kin Hubbard

I work with gold that holds history, diamonds that see the future, and rubies that long for love. - Waris Ahluwalia

Marrying for love may be a bit risky, but it is so honest that God can't help but smile on it. - Josh Billings

The greatest happiness love can offer is the first pressure of hands between you and your beloved. - Stendhal

For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, of love and of self-discipline. - Bible

To give truth to him who does not love the truth is to only give more reasons for misinterpretation. - George Macdonald

I love these little people; and it is not a slight thing when they, who are so fresh from God, love us. - Charles Dickens

The opposite of love isn't hate - it's indifference. And if you hate me, that means you still care. - Marcia Cross

Practice mercy and forgiveness throughout as a lesson that symbolizes the love shown through his crucifixion. - Unarine Ramaru

Even in the midst of life's adversity, struggle or strife, love's enduring presence remains steadfast. - Eleesha

Love is an ideal thing, marriage is a real thing. A confusion of the real with the ideal never goes unpunished. - Johann Wolfgang Goethe

I played basketball in high school, and I love watching sports - I'll watch everything except maybe hockey. - Andy Roddick

Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac? - George Carlin

Love is missing someone whenever you're apart, but somehow feeling warm inside because you're close in heart. - Kay Knudsen

There's an upside to grandparenthood. You play, you give, you love, then you hand them back and go to an early movie. - Billy Crystal

It's tangible, it's solid, it's beautiful. It's artistic, from my standpoint, and I just love real estate. - Donald Trump

A mother's heart, a mother's faith, and a mother's steadfast love were fashioned by the angels and sent from God above. - Unknown

Love is the thing that enables a woman to sing while she mops up the floor after her husband has walked across it in his barn boots. - Hoosier Farmer

The shoulders I stand on are broad and strong, full of history and courage and love. How about you? Whose shoulders are you standing on? - Molly Johnson

William Hurt has a painful last name. Kevin Love has a name perfect for February 14th. But what about Johnny Longdong? Where does he fit? - Jarod Kintz

Throw your dream into space like a kite, and you do not know what it will bring back: a new life, a new friend, a new love, a new country. - Anais Nin

I do not love to work out, but if I stick to exercising every day and put the right things in my mouth, then my diabetes just stays in check. - Halle Berry

Animals are like little angels sent to earth to teach us how to love. They don't get angry or play silly games. They are always there for us. - Whitney Mandel


Hot Summer Days

mIndians

Mouthful Of Information

Happy Face Sandwich

Senior Eye Exam

Chubby Free

Pirrows

Young Rock Star

Restored Beauty

Powerplant Swimsuit Models

Watermelon Cake

Sharkini

Julyed

Filet Minion

Better Singer

Texas Basketball

Grow Food, Not Lawns

Nut Salesman

Long Yellow Things

Ants Know When Something Is Fake

Think Outside

Despicable Wood Stove

Engineering Flowchart

Egotist