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Prison Santa

Santa gives toys to bad boys

Prison Santa thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

This is dedicated to all those who rob and steal from others, and make Christmas a very difficult time in the year for some. May you find your prison some day, forever in the North Pole. PS: Thanks for breaking into my house this Christmas... the Joe-kster

QuotaBills
Santa's Guh-nomes - Archie Bunker

Make crime pay. Become a lawyer. - Will Rogers

The crime of loving is forgetting. - Maurice Chevalier

All people look better under arrest. - John Waters

Procrastination is the thief of time. - Edward Young

Crime does not pay as well as politics. - Alfred E. Newman

An art thief is a man who takes pictures. - George Carlin

Suspicion often creates what it suspects. - C S Lewis

Behind every great fortune there is a crime. - Honore de Balzac

Poverty is the parent of revolution and crime. - Aristotle

Is it a bigger crime to rob a bank or to open one? - Ted Allan

The police are recruited from the criminal classes. - Gore Vidal

The police must obey the law while enforcing the law. - Earl Warren

All mothers have intuition. The great ones have radar. - Cathy Guisewite

He who has reaped the profits has committed the crime. - Seneca

The robbed that smiles, steals something from the thief. - William Shakespeare

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

I think crime pays. The hours are good, and you travel a lot. - Woody Allen

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

Rape is the only crime in which the victim becomes the accused. - Freda Adler

Don King is a big ... thief, and everyone in this room knows it. - Donald Trump

I don't own a camera, so I travel with a police sketch artist. - George Carlin

It is a lot harder now to be a police officer than what it used to be. - Steven Seagal

When some folks agree with my opinions I begin to suspect I'm wrong. - Kin Hubbard

When a police officer tells you to stay in the car, you stay in the car. - Reese Witherspoon

Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police. - Unknown

I wanted a man who wouldn't stray so I'm dating a guy on house arrest. - Kim Bove

The police are not here to create disorder, they;re here to preserve disorder. - Richard J Daley

The police force cannot be completely independent of the executive government. - P Chidambaram

Outside of the killings, D.C. has one of the lowest crime rates in the country. - Marion Barry

If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? - George Carlin

Tabloid: 1. A newspaper with a permanent crime wave; 2. A screamlined newspaper. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Growing old is like being increasingly penalized for a crime you haven't committed. - Anthony Powell

I'm the only woman who can walk in Central Park at night... and reduce the crime rate. - Phyllis Diller

The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything. - Oscar Wilde

You will never be free until you free yourself from the prison of your own false thoughts. - Unknown

When a man commits the same crime twice, and is not punished, it seems to him permissible. - Talmud

If crime fighters fight crime and fire fighters fight fire, what do freedom fighters fight? - George Carlin

He was always late on principle; his principle being that punctuality is the thief of time. - Oscar Wilde

The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large. - Josh Billings

The toilets at a local police station have been stolen. Police say they have nothing to go on. - Ronnie Corbett

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

A police force, wherever they are, is made up of amazing people, and I respect them a great deal. - Nancy McKeon

Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton. - Dan Duva

Police officers may drive black and white cars, however what goes on in their job is a lot of gray. - Arik Matson

We don't seem to be able to check crime, so why not legalize it and then tax it out of business. - Will Rogers

If you haven't seen your wife smile at a traffic cop, you haven't seen her smile her prettiest. - Kin Hubbard

A cement mixer has collided with a prison van. Motorists are asked to look out for 16 hardened criminals. - Ronnie Corbett

My parents live in a retirement community, which is basically a minimum-security prison with a golf course. - Joel Warshaw

Many commit the same crime with very different results. One bears a cross for his crime, the other a crown. - Juvenal

Women are like the police. They could have all the evidence in the world, but they still want the confession. - Chris Rock

In school, every period ends with a bell. Every sentence ends with a period. Every crime ends with a sentence. - Steven Wright

The true identity theft is not financial. It's not in cyberspace. It's spiritual. It's been taken. - Stephen Covey

The true soldier fights not because he hates what is in front of him, but because he loves what is behind him. - G K Chesterton

The crime problem in New York is getting really serious. The other day the Statue of Liberty had both hands up. - Jay Leno

One of the many lessons that one learns in prison is, that things are what they are and will be what they will be. - Oscar Wilde

For all of the fights I have had in my life, both on and off the ice, I have only been in the back of a cop car once. - Tie Domi

I stopped believing in Santa Claus when I was six. Mother took me to see him in a department store and he asked for my autograph. - Shirley Temple

When I was a kid, one cop could have taken care of the whole neighborhood. Now, one cop wouldn't be safe in the neighborhood. - Mike Royko

There is a blessed necessity by which the interest of men is always driving them to the right, and making all crime mean and ugly. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

I think our police are excellent, probably because I have not done anything that has occasioned being beaten up by these good men. - Clement Freud

Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with the other men. There is a three year waiting list. - Yakov Smirnoff

When you have police officers who abuse citizens, you erode public confidence in law enforcement. That makes the job of good police officers unsafe. - Mary F Berry


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