Redneck Stairs

In the haunted house of life, art is the only stair that doesn't creak. - Tom Robbins

My friend Sam has one leg. I went to his house. I couldn't go up the stairs. - Steven Wright

A man's health can be judged by which he takes two at a time - pills or stairs. - Joan Welsh

If quantum mechanics hasn't profoundly shocked you, you haven't understood it yet. - Niels Bohr

Faith goes up the stairs that love has built and looks out the window which hope has opened. - Charles Spurgeon

A habit cannot be tossed out the window. It must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time. - Mark Twain

My mechanic told me, "I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder." - Steven Wright

The elevator to success is out of order. You'll have to use the stairs... one step at a time. - Joe Girard

The minute there's a map, there is no art. Paint by numbers is not art. Paint by numbers is a mechanical activity. - Seth Godin

At fifty, the madwoman in the attic breaks loose, stomps down the stairs, and sets fire to the house. She won't be imprisoned anymore. - Erica Jong