#1 humor site on the 'net

Rush Hour Ice

When it's not n'ice to be on the road

Rush Hour Ice thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Liquid ice: Warm weather eating away at your profit margins?

QuotaBills
Handkerchief: Cold storage - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Water is the only drink for a wise man. - Henry David Thoreau

I detest him more than cold boiled veal. - Lord Macaulay

Water that does not move is always shallow. - Sami Proverb

Room service - don't send up any more ice. - WC Fields

The conscious water saw its Master and blushed. - Alexander Pope

Hot heads and cold hearts never solved anything. - Billy Graham

Water Polo: What horses play in the swimming pool - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Sometimes I drink water just to surprise my liver. - WC Fields

Like water, we are truest to our nature in repose. - Cyril Connolly

Some say the world will end in fire, some say in ice. - Robert Frost

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

Droughts are because god didn't pay his water bill. - Steven Wright

A diamond is the only kind of ice that keeps a girl warm. - Elizabeth Taylor

I moved to Florida because you don't have to shovel water. - James Randi

Hydroponic Gardening: Using a plant to convert water into yard work - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration. - Lou Erickson

I finally found out how priests get holy water. They boil the hell out of it. - Joan Rivers

A woman is like a teabag. Only in hot water do you realize how strong she is. - Nancy Reagan

Whiskey is by far the most popular of all remedies that won't cure a cold. - Jerry Vale

Warm Water Theorem: When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone rings - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Don't throw away the old bucket until you know whether the new one holds water. - Swedish Proverb

You know you're a mom when you understand why mama bear's porridge was cold. - Jody Defries

Puddle: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. - WC Fields

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends. - Kin Hubbard

A cold wind was blowing from the north, and it made the trees rustle like living things. - George R.R. Martin

It's a strange world of language in which skating on thin ice can get you into hot water. - Franklin P. Jones

If NASA really wants to find water on Mars, they should just send me there to hit a golf ball. - Gene Jaster

What is harder than rock, or softer than water? Yet soft water hollows out hard rock. Persevere. - Ovid

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

When the clergyman's daughter
Drinks nothing but water
She's certain to finish on gin. - Rudyard Kipling

All the plants in my house are dead - I shot them last night. I was teasing them by watering them with ice cubes. - Steven Wright

Be like a duck, paddling and working very hard inside the water, but what everyone sees is a smiling and calm face. - Manoj Arora

I welcome him like I welcome cold sores. He's from England, he's angry, and he's got Mad Power Disease. - Paula Abdul

Everyone knows that ice cream is worth the trouble of being cold. Like all things virtuous, you have to suffer to gain the reward. - Brandon Sanderson

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body. - Oliver Wendell Holmes

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

New Pasta Diet: Just walk pasta bakery without stopping. Walk pasta candy store without stopping. Walk pasta ice cream shop without stopping. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

NBC News just called it "The Great Freeze" - coldest weather in years. Is our country still spending money on the global warming hoax? - Donald Trump


mIndians

Mouthful Of Information

Happy Face Sandwich

Senior Eye Exam

Chubby Free

Pirrows

Young Rock Star

Restored Beauty

Powerplant Swimsuit Models

Watermelon Cake

Sharkini

Julyed

Filet Minion

Better Singer

Texas Basketball

Grow Food, Not Lawns

Nut Salesman

Long Yellow Things

Ants Know When Something Is Fake

Think Outside

Despicable Wood Stove

Engineering Flowchart

Egotist

Hunter's Dream Wedding