#1 humor site on the 'net

Tongue Twister

Good to the last drop

Tongue Twister thanks to Keith Blake

QuotaBills
Diets are mainly food for thought. - N Wylie Jones

The French: Germans with good food. - Fran Lebowitz

Patience is the secret to good food. - Gail Simmons

The most dangerous food is wedding cake. - James Thurber

There ain't no such thing as wrong food. - Sean Stewart

Food is an important part of a balanced diet. - Fran Lebowitz

The deeper the sorrow, the less tongue it has. - Talmud

The tongue is ever turning to the aching tooth. - Thomas Fuller

There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw

Give me the ready hand rather than the ready tongue. - Garibaldi

If I have one addiction in life, it's probably food. - Liam Hemsworth

Humor is the first of the gifts to perish in a foreign tongue. - Virginia Woolf

The rich would have to eat money if the poor did not provide food. - Russia Proverb

I was so drunk, I thought a tube of toothpaste was astronaut food. - Will Ferell

I'm a bit of a gourmet chef. I love cooking - mostly Thai food. - Will Ferrell

If you are looking for a fly in your food, it means that you are full. - South Africa Proverb

Short of screaming-hot Thai food, everything can be suitable for kids too. - Guy Fieri

The maxim that the "best is the cheapest" does not apply to food. - W.O. Atwater

Symptoms are the body's mother tongue; signs are in a foreign language. - John Brown

I go silent so I can write. When my tongue is wagging, my fingers are silent. - Sonia Rumzi

The only time to eat diet food is while you're waiting for the steak to cook. - Julia Child

An Englishman teaching an American about food is like the blind leading the one-eyed. - A.J. Liebling

People want honest, flavourful food, not some show-off meal that takes days to prepare. - Ted Allen

Older people shouldn't eat health food, they need all the preservatives they can get. - Robert Orben

What separates the winners from the losers is how a person reacts to each new twist of fate. - Donald Trump

The best time for you to hold your tongue is the time you feel you must say something or bust. - Josh Billings

Cajun is country food by farmers and fisherman that arrived in Louisiana from Acadiana, Canada. - Paul Prudhomme

I'm glad I don't have to hunt for my food. I don't even know where Sandwiches live. - Bill Murray

The highlight of my childhood was making my brother laugh so hard that food came out of his nose. - Garrison Keillor

The automatic stabilizer is unemployment insurance, food stamps, additional coverage of Medicaid. - Franklin Raines

Number theorists are like lotus-eaters – having once tasted of this food they can never give it up. - Leopold Kronecker

Sea spaghetti looks like dark fettuccine and has a similar texture - you can get it in health food stores or online. - Yotam Ottolenghi

Malenutrition: The practice of depriving a man from food for more than a couple of hours - or during a football game - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Englishmen learn Christ's law best in English. Moses heard God's law in his own tongue; so did Christ's apostles. - John Wycliffe

If another one of my Whole Food friends says my wife should have a home birth, I am going to punch all the soy on the planet. - Patton Oswalt

I like Pirate's Booty. Prunes and olives, too. I love hummus. I can eat that until I die. I tend to eat mostly organic food. - Queen Latifah

The first virtue is to restrain the tongue; he approaches nearest to gods who knows how to be silent, even though he is in the right. - Cato The Elder

I worked in a health food store once. A guy came in and asked me, "If I melt dry ice, can I take a bath without getting wet?" - Steven Wright

I like a quiet evening with family or friends over, great food and great discussion, and a lot of laughter. That's really what fills my tank. - Anna Eshoo

I'll paddle board, swim in the ocean, roll in the sand, soak up the sun, eat good food, be with friends and family and go fishing with my dad. - Behati Prinsloo


SailBite Ride - Swimming Not Advised

Aisle Cleanup

His Dent

Car Surgeon

Slamming On Your Brakes

Need A Cigarette?

CardboardZilla

Weather Rock - For Accurate Forecasts

Water Taxi

Acapulco Waterfront Property

Just Blew It

Wouldn't want to scratch that fancy bed liner

Lunch Break

Digging One's Own Grave

See The Difference?

Gas and Dash

OctoMask

Bird on a Wire (past tense)

Workplace Hazards in Tasmania

Tiger On A Roll

Men's Golf Rules

Where Did He Go?

Sudden Invented Syndrome

Calculus Drinks