#1 humor site on the 'net

What Bird?

Cat in the act

What Bird? thanks to Idske Mulder, The Netherlands

Some days it's hard to hide the evidence

QuotaBills
Bird House: Home Tweet Home. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

The early bird catches the worm. - English Proverb

Birds of a feather flock together. - English Proverb

I want to paint the way a bird sings. - Claude Monet

Wishing to be a bird so you can Fly Away. - Unknown

Heavenly bodies are nests of invisible birds. - Dejan Stojanovic

The shell must break before the bird can fly. - Unknown

Birds born in a cage think flying is an illness. - Alejandro Jodorowsky

A cat is a puzzle for which there is no solution. - Hazel Nicholson

Going to law is losing a cow for the sake of a cat. - Mark Twain

Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time. - Jean Paul

No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat. - Leo Dworkin

Intelligence without ambition is a bird without wings. - Salvador Dali

The early bird gets the worm. The early worm gets eaten. - Norman Augustine

The early bird catches the worm, eats more, and dies sooner. - Czech Proverb

Flying without feathers is not easy; my wings have no feathers. - Plautus

If the cat sits long enough at the hole, it will catch the mouse. - Irish proverb

Impeccable: 1. Having immunity to woodpeckers; 2. Hidden from birds. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

There are two means of refuge from the miseries of life: music and cats. - Albert Schweitzer

The main difference between a cat and a lie is that a cat only has nine lives. - Mark Twain

Though what bird in the best of circumstances does not look a little stricken? - Lorrie Moore

When black cats prowl and pumpkins gleam,
May luck be yours on Halloween. - Unknown

I planted some bird seed. A bird came up. Now I don't know what to feed it. - Steven Wright

The structure of a play is always the story of how the birds come home to roost. - Arthur Miller

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

If man could be crossed with the cat, it would improve man, but deteriorate the cat. - Mark Twain

Birds find shelter during the rain, but eagles avoid rain by flying above the clouds. - Abdul Kalam

I love cats because I enjoy my home, and little by little they become its visible soul. - Jean Cocteau

Without my Vulcan cat suit, Frankenstein wig and pointed ears, I don't get recognized. - Jolene Blalock

Skunk: 1. A streamlined cat with a 2-tone finish and a fluid drive; 2. A community scenter. - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

My husband, Fang, is so dumb I once said, "There's a dead bird." He looked up. - Phyllis Diller

A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there. - Charles Darwin

Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea. - Robert A. Heinlein

Be grateful for luck. Pay the thunder no mind. Listen to the birds. And don't hate nobody. - Eubie Blake

Marriage is like a cage; one sees the birds outside desperate to get in, and those inside desperate to get out. - Ogden Nash

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds died they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused. - Steven Wright

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

If I were a flower,
humming bird would be my favourite bee
And If I were blind,
the light of darkness I'd love to see - Munia Khan

Join voices, all ye living souls: ye birds,
That singing up to heaven-gate ascend,
Bear on your wings and in your notes his praise. - John Milton

Like a prisoner awaiting his release, like a schoolboy when the end of term is near, like a migrant bird ready to fly south... I long to be gone. - Malcolm Muggeridge


9 Months On The Inside

Noah Called

The Mighty Stegosaurus

Get A Dog They Said

Are You Ready?

Down Day

Peddle Sewing Machine Sink

You Never Call

Dawntastic

Work Rules

Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers

Less Severe Inflation

Hotel Annex

King Stump

Diet Carbs

Home Made Limo

Cool Reading Room

Biggest Fan On The Block

Vintage Birth Control

Close Shave

Australian RV

Panorama Dog

Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation

Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer