#1 humor site on the 'net

Ab Enhancer

Take my ab-vice - this exercise machine kicks butt

Ab Enhancer thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Are you a pseudo-athlete?

QuotaBills
I could eat my body weight in sushi. - Mikey Way

I find forgiveness to be really healthy. - Ben Affleck

Happiness is good health and a bad memory. - Ingrid Bergman

You know why fish are so thin? They eat fish. - Jerry Seinfeld

It's simple. If it jiggles, it's fat. - Arnold Schwarzenegger

Finally my winter fat is done. Now I have spring rolls. - Unknown

The only thin a boyfriend was good for was a shattered heart. - Becca Fitzpatrick

Information is pretty thin stuff unless mixed with experience. - Clarence Day

I don't mind that I'm fat. You still get the same money. - Marlon Brando

Sleep, riches, and health to be truly enjoyed must be interrupted. - Johann Paul Friedrich Richter

I don't diet, I just don't eat as much as I'd like to. - Linda Evangelista

The key to a healthy lawn is to take care of what happens below ground. - Mike Bechtle

I've been on a diet for two weeks and all I've lost is two weeks. - Totie Fields

A rich rogue is like a fat hog, who never does good 'til as dead as a log. - Benjamin Franklin

You can't lose weight by talking about it. You have to keep your mouth shut. - Old Farmer's Almanac

With my sunglasses on, I'm Jack Nicholson. Without them, I'm fat and 60. - Jack Nicholson

Who ever hears of fat men heading a riot, or herding together in turbulent mobs? - Washington Irving

The two kinds of people on earth are the people who lift and the people who lean. - Unknown

A spouse or partner should enhance your life, not be your life; your life is your own. - Sukhi Burgen

Logic is the hygiene the mathematician practices to keep his ideas healthy and strong. - Hermann Weyl

My act is sort of improvisational. I have a skeleton in my head, but no fat or skin on it. - Paula Poundstone

I went on a diet, swore off drinking and heavy eating, and in fourteen days I lost two weeks. - Joe E Lewis

I never worry about diets. The only carrots that interest me are the number you get in a diamond. - Mae West

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

Iceomaniac: One who has to go out of their way to step on thin ice to hear a satisfying crunching sound - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

Reading a good book in silence is like eating chocolate for the rest of your life and never getting fat. - Becca Fitzpatrick

A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience. - John Updike

Dieting is not a sprint, it's a marathon. If you celebrate the small victories, you will eventually win the war. - Ian K Smith

The biggest seller is cookbooks and the second is diet books - how not to eat what you've just learned now to cook. - Andy Rooney

I cannot but bless the memory of Julius Caesar, for the great esteem he expressed for fat men; and his aversion to lean ones. - David Hume

In soap, fatty acids made from boiling pork bone fat are used as a hardening agent, but also for giving it a pearl-like effect. - Christien Meindertsma

Does America really need to be the best at everything? You already dominate the world in economics, military power and obesity. - Trevor Noah

A party of order or stability, and a party of progress or reform, are both necessary elements of a healthy state of political life. - John Stuart Mill

The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd druther not. - Mark Twain

Lost wealth may be replaced by industry; lost knowledge by study; lost health by temperance or medicine; but lost time is gone forever. - Samuel Smiles

The purpose of architecture is to shelter and enhance man's life on earth and to fulfill his belief in the nobility of his existence. - Eero Saarinen

Every essential oil has a healing purpose. I think it's a great gift because it's something that elevates your mood and your health. - Yolanda Hadid

Maintaining healthy forests is essential to those who make a living from the land and for those of us who use them for recreational purposes. - Cathy M. Rodgers

Health is the finest possession. Contentment is the ultimate wealth. Trustworthy people are the best relatives. Unbinding is the supreme ease. - Buddha

Thank you... fat dude with giant headphones on the subway, for looking like what would've happened if Jabba the Hutt mated with Princess Leia. - Jimmy Fallon


Canned Art

Bubble Boy

High Wire Bear Feeder

Manitoba Thunderstorm

Watermelon Shark

Curses, Foiled Again

Recipe Holder

Where Do You Want To Eat?

Pick Up After Your Dogs!

Lego Bridge

Falls Trail Tree

Melting Kayak

Beetle Collection

Croc Diet

Plane Restaurant

Holiday Fun

Sandwich Shoes

Fearless

Finally Got A Haircut

Fedorable Platypuses

Lego Sushi

Hedge Face

Computer Bread

Robbers Lives Matter