All Fun And Games

Laughter is the best medicine. - Joe-kster

A young doctor means a new graveyard. - German Proverb

God heals, and the doctor takes the fees. - Benjamin Franklin

Nurses are the hospitality of the hospital. - Carrie Latet

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

False Doctrine: Giving people the wrong medicine - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

An asylum for the sane would be empty in America. - George Bernard Shaw

Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck

Nursing would be a dream job if there were no doctors. - Gerhard Kocher

Whether a person is a male or female, a nurse is a nurse. - Gary Veale

If we become ill, modern medicine can work healing miracles. - Joseph B Wirthlin

A nurse will always give us hope, an angel with a stethoscope. - Terri Guillemets

A smart mother makes often a better diagnosis than a poor doctor. - August Bier

Joy is more divine than sorrow, for joy is bread and sorrow is medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

My doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. - Rodney Dangerfield

Those who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. - George Carlin

To array a man's will against his sickness is the supreme art of medicine. - Henry Ward Beecher

If you are too smart to pay the doctor, you had better be too smart to get ill. - African Proverb

No, Doctor, I don't want to grow young again. I just want to keep on growing old. - Madame de Rothschild

If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman

I'm not feeling very well - I need a doctor immediately. Ring the nearest golf course. - Groucho Marx

I wonder why you can always read a Doctor's bill but you can never read his prescription. - Finley Peter Dunne

Constant attention by a good nurse may be just as important as a major operation by a surgeon. - Dag Hammarskjold

And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

The definition of insanity in Texas is so insane that it's impossible to be insane in Texas. - Malcolm McDowell

The road to medical knowledge is through the pathological museum and not through an apothecary's shop. - William Withey Gull

In the sick room, ten cents' worth of human understanding equals ten dollars' worth of medical science. - Martin H. Fischer

Recommending gastric bypass as a national solution for our diabetes epidemic is bad medicine and bad economics. - Mark Hyman

My illness is due to my doctor's insistence that I drink milk, a whitish fluid they force down helpless babies. - WC Fields

The trained nurse has become one of the great blessings of humanity, taking a place beside the physician and the priest. - William Osler

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

A doctor who cannot take a good history and a patient who cannot give one are in danger of giving and receiving bad treatment. - Unknown

If there were no schools to take the children away from home part of the time, the insane asylums would be filled with mothers. - Edgar W. Howe

Let no one suppose that the words doctor and patient can disguise from the parties the fact that they are employer and employee. - George Bernard Shaw

A doctor must work eighteen hours a day and seven days a week. If you cannot console yourself to this, get out of the profession. - Martin H. Fischer

When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield

A man who cannot work without his hypodermic needle is a poor doctor. The amount of narcotic you use is inversely proportional to your skill. - Martin H. Fischer

My Doctor told me to watch my drinking. Now I drink in front of a mirror. I drink too much. Way too much. My doctor drew blood. He ran a tab. - Rodney Dangerfield

Just be good and kind to your children. Not only are they the future of the world, they're the ones who can sign you into the nursing home. - Dennis Miller

One of the first duties of the physician is to educate the masses not to take medicine... Soap and water and common sense are the best disinfectants. - William Osler