#1 humor site on the 'net

And The Most Terrifying Santa Award This Year Goes To...

Some say that Santa looks better this year

And The Most Terrifying Santa Award This Year Goes To... thanks to Keith Blake

Yesteryear Christmas stress for children

QuotaBills
Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

A turkey never voted for an early Christmas. - Unknown

The ornament of a house is the friends who frequent it. - Ralph Waldo Emerson

If we let things terrify us, life will not be worth living. - Seneca

Stress should be a powerful driving force, not an obstacle. - Bob Phillips

Modesty is not only an ornament, but also a guard to virtue. - Joseph Addison

I'm going to the North Pole to help out Santa this year. - Jimmy Fallon

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year. - Victor Borge

We must have a pie. Stress cannot exist in the presence of a pie. - David Mamet

Too much homework can cause stress, depression and even lower grades. - Unknown

Stress is an important dragon to slay - or at least tame - in your life. - Marilu Henner

Stress is an ignorant state. It believes that everything is an emergency. - Natalie Goldberg

God will never give you anything you can't handle, so don't stress. - Kelly Clarkson

Retirement means no pressure, no stress, no heartache... unless you play golf. - Gene Perret

Adopting the right attitude can convert a negative stress into a positive one. - Hans Selye

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

Stress depletes willpower, which diminishes your ability to control those emotions. - Roy F Baumeister

Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa. - Bart Simpson

Stress is your body's way of saying you haven't worked enough unpaid overtime. - Scott Adams

Man should not try to avoid stress any more than he would shun food, love, or exercise. - Hans Selye

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

Learning is an ornament in prosperity, a refuge in adversity, and a provision in old age. - Aristotle

Stress exacerbates any problem, whether it's diabetes, heart trouble, MS, or whatever. - Mary Ann Mobley

The most terrifying thing any woman can say to me is, 'Notice anything different?' - Mike Vanatta

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The Bermuda Triangle got tired of warm weather. It moved to Alaska. Now Santa Claus is missing. - Steven Wright

In times of great stress or adversity, plow your anger and your energy into something positive. - Lee Iacocca

I still have my Christmas Tree. I looked at it today. Sure enough, I couldn't see any forests. - Steven Wright

The Christmas season has come to mean the period when the public plays Santa Claus to the merchants. - John Andrew Holmes

Might make a real good Christmas present for the uninformed. The book is called 'Taking America Back.' - Paul Harvey

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

Transformation also means looking for ways to stop pushing yourself so hard professionally or inviting so much stress. - Gail Sheehy

I'm not just retiring from the company, I'm also retiring from my stress, my commute, my alarm clock, and my iron. - Hartman Jule

The nine most terrifying words in the English language are,
"I'm from the government and I'm here to help." - Ronald Reagan

Animals are not our selfie props. If there's any risk that your photo is going to hurt or stress an animal, it's not worth it. - Angela Henderson

Keep your sense of humor. There's enough stress in the rest of your life to let bad shots ruin a game you're supposed to enjoy. - Amy Alcott

And why should it not be terrifying? A little terror, in my view, is good for the soul, when it is terror in the face of a noble object. - Robertson Davies

Wise sayings are not only for ornament, but for action and business, having a point or edge, whereby knots in business are pierced and discovered. - Francis Bacon


9 Months On The Inside

Noah Called

The Mighty Stegosaurus

Get A Dog They Said

Are You Ready?

Down Day

Peddle Sewing Machine Sink

You Never Call

Dawntastic

Work Rules

Navy Golf Course for Aircraft Carriers

Less Severe Inflation

Hotel Annex

King Stump

Diet Carbs

Home Made Limo

Cool Reading Room

Biggest Fan On The Block

Vintage Birth Control

Close Shave

Australian RV

Panorama Dog

Revenue Canada Subscription Cancellation

Why You Shouldn't Let Your Dog Drink Beer