Birth Control At Its Finest
Preventing back seat accidents
QuotaBillsMedicine is the best medicine. - Doctors Anonymous
No doctor is better than three. - German Proverb
Thank God kids never mean well. - Lily Tomlin
Nature is cheaper than therapy. - M P Zarrella
Time is generally the best doctor. - Ovid
No medicine cures what happiness cannot. - Gabriel G Marquez
Borscht: Beet soup with high blood pressure - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
The No. 1 cause of bankruptcies is medical bills. - Michael Moore
Raising kids is a walk in the park. Jurassic Park. - Unknown
Hope is medicine for a soul that's sick and tired. - Eric Swensson
Juvenile Delinquency: Modern term for what we did as kids - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Never lend your car to anyone to whom you have given birth. - Erma Bombeck
My Birth Certificate is so old, it's written in Roman Numerals. - Bill Carter
Intellectual growth should commence at birth and cease only at death. - Albert Einstein
I quit therapy because my analyst was trying to help me behind my back. - Richard Lewis
Joy Of Motherhood: What a woman experiences when all the kids are in bed - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the Doctor's book. - Irish Proverb
Financial ruin from medical bills is almost exclusively an American disease. - Roul Turley
Oh my God! Space aliens! Don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! - Homer Simpson
All kids need is a little help, a little hope, and somebody who believes in them. - Earvin "Magic" Johnson
The most effective form of birth control I know is spending the day with my kids. - Jill Bensley
My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor. - Phyllis Diller
The only medicine for suffering, crime, and all the other woes of mankind, is wisdom. - Thomas Huxley
If you want to get out of medicine the fullest enjoyment, be students all your lives. - David Riesman
Energy: Element of vitality kids always have an oversupply of until asked to do something - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Because: Mom's reason for having kids do things which can't be explained logically - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
Zucchini: Vegetable which can be baked, boiled, fried or steamed before kids refuse to eat it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com
A man has reached middle age when he is warned to slow down by his doctor instead of the police. - Unknown
You know how kids dream of being soccer players or actors? Well, my dream was to be a sushi chef. - Nobu Matsuhisa
A library should be the delivery room for the birth of ideas - a place where history comes to life. - Norman Cousins
There are some things in life where it's better to receive than to give, and massage is one of them. - Al Michaels
Cleaning your house while your kids are still growing is like shovelling the walk before it stops snowing. - Phyllis Diller
Kindness and a generous spirit go a long way. And a sense of humor. It's like medicine - very healing. - Max Irons
We cannot embrace God's forgiveness if we are so busy clinging to past wounds and nursing old grudges. - T D Jakes
Most ballet teachers in the United States are terrible. If they were in medicine, everyone would be poisoned. - George Balanchine
Even if the doctor does not give you a year ... make one brave push and see what can be accomplished in a week. - Robert Louis Stevenson
Health is the state about which medicine has nothing to say; sanctity is the state about which theology has nothing to say. - W H Auden
If you want your kids to listen to you, don't yell at them. Whisper. Make them lean in. My kids taught me that. I do it with adults now. - Mario Batali
When I was born the doctor came out to the waiting room and told my father, "We did everything we could... but he pulled through." - Rodney Dangerfield
Like all parents, my husband and I just do the best we can, and hold our breath and hope we've set aside enough money for our kids' therapy. - Michelle Pfeiffer