#1 humor site on the 'net

Carpet Dog

Can you spot the pet in the carpet?

Carpet Dog thanks to Roy Taylor

Now available - transparent persian car-pets

QuotaBills
Love me, love my dog. - English Proverb

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

A dog has the soul of a philosopher. - Plato

I am I because my little dog knows me. - Gertrude Stein

Illusion is the first of all pleasures. - Oscar Wilde

Dogs that bark at a distance never bite. - Unknown

Dogs can't operate an MRI machine but cats can. - Unknown

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's gone. - Steven Wright

If a man be great, even his dog will ear a proud look. - Japanese Proverb

The scalded dog fears hot water, and afterwards, cold. - Italian Proverb

I am old enough to know that a red carpet is just a rug. - Al Gore

Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. - Ludwig Borne

Anyone who hates children and dogs can't be all bad. - WC Fields

Dogs do speak, but only to those who know how to listen. - Unknown

A door is what a dog is perpetually on the wrong side of. - Ogden Nash

Hot Dog: The only animal that feeds the hand that bites it - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

I used to look like a deer in headlights on the red carpet. - Emily Blunt

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. - Albert Einstein

Dogs come into our lives and leave paw prints on our hearts. - Unknown

I've been on so many blind dates, I should get a free dog. - Wendy Liebman

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

To his dog, every man is Napoleon; hence the constant popularity of dogs. - Aldous Huxley

The more I see of the representatives of the people, the more I admire my dogs. - Alphonse de Lamartine

Every boy should have two things: a dog and a mother willing to let him have one. - Unknown

Dogs come when they're called; cats take a message and get back to you later. - Unknown

I am obsessed with Costco. I love the salmon and rotisserie chicken, the dog beds. - Kris Jenner

Raising boys is like raising puppies. One must take them for a walk every few hours. - Jody Defries

Get a good idea and stay with it. Dog it, and work at it until it's done, and done right. - Walt Disney

You might be a redneck if your favorite hunting dog has a bigger tombstone than your grandfather. - Jeff Foxworthy

Asking a working writer what he thinks about critics is like asking a lamppost how it feels about dogs. - Christopher Hampton

Obama and his attack dogs have nothing but hate and anger in their hearts and spew it whenever possible. - Donald Trump

Did you ever walk into a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives. - Sue Murphy

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man. - Mark Twain

Dogs laugh, but the laugh with their tails. What puts man in a higher state of evolution is that he has got his laugh on the right end. - Max Eastman

My life is the land, the dogs, the car, the motorcycle, the pond, the canoe, going to pick up mail. It's just a rural retreat that I enjoy. - Burt Shavitz


Swimsuit Police

Waiting For The Perfect Man

Dutch Cowboy

2021 Hooters Owl and Birds of Prey Calendars

Ship Tow

Fish Walk

Paradigm Shift

Spanish Stairs

TyrannoSnowRus Rex

Hawaii Surfing

Should Have Pulled Out

Leonardo da Vinci's Unfinished Portrait

Cooking For Guys

One Sushi Is Enough

Before Online Dating

Wood Trike

Crow Species

Young or Old Swimmer?

Japanese Keyboard

Baby Peephole

Exit Not Found

Cat Burglar

Foot Race

Lockdown Advice