#1 humor site on the 'net

Christmas Fruit Tree

Decorating an edible Christmas tree

Christmas Fruit Tree thanks to Wayne Nowazek

No water needed - simply 'wet' your appetite!

Christmas Fruit Tree thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Christmas Fruit Tree thanks to Wayne Nowazek

Christmas Fruit Tree thanks to Wayne Nowazek

QuotaBills
The fruit of silence is tranquility. - Arabian Proverb

Does wine count as a serving of fruit? - Joe-kster

Elderberry: Wisest fruit on the branch - Daffynitions joe-ks.com

German headshrinker named Sigmund Fruit - Archie Bunker

Recipe for a happy husband: Fake and Bake. - Unknown

Christmas comes, but once a year is enough. - American Proverb

All men's gains are the fruit of venturing. - Herodotus

The trees that are slow to grow bear the best fruit. - Moliere

Excellence in any pursuit is the late, ripe fruit of toil. - W.M.L. Jay

Halloween starts earlier and earlier, just like Christmas. - Robert Englund

The roots of education are bitter, but the fruit is sweet. - Aristotle

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Kahlil Gibran

Life without love is like a tree without blossoms or fruit. - Khalil Gibran

I'm walking backwards for Christmas Across the Irish Sea. - Spike Milligan

Native ability without education is like a tree without fruit. - Aristippus

Character is the root of the tree; conduct, the fruit it bears. - E.M. Bounds

A large income is the best recipe for happiness I ever heard of. - Jane Austen

Plant the seed of meditation and reap the fruit of peace of mind. - Unknown

Don't be afraid to go out on a limb. That's where the fruit is. - H. Jackson Browne

The processes of growth are gradual, bearing fruit in a decade, not a day. - John F Kennedy

Watermelon - it's a good fruit. You eat, you drink, you wash your face. - Enrico Caruso

Wishing to be friends is quick work, but friendship is a slow ripening fruit. - Aristotle

Nothing's as mean as giving a little child something useful for Christmas. - Kin Hubbard

Mail your packages early, so the Post Office can lose them in time for Christmas. - Johnny Carson

If my Valentine you won't be,
I'll hang myself on your Christmas tree. - Ernest Hemingway

I built my church on Easter services, Christmas Eve services, and Norman Vincent Peale. - Robert H. Schuller

True and solemn meaning of Christmas, which is a time for peace and quiet contemptation. - Archie Bunker

If 'ifs and buts' were 'candy and nuts', we'd have Christmas every day. - Unknown

The shoe that fits one person pinches another; there is no recipe for living that suits all cases. - Carl Jung

I know I'm not sexy. When I put my underwear on I can hear the Fruit-of-the-Loom guys giggling. - Rodney Dangerfield

I prefer Hostess fruit pies to pop-up toaster tarts because they don't require as much cooking. - Carrie Snow

Once you have mastered a technique, you hardly need look at a recipe again, and can take off on your own. - Julia Child

Whatever I am offered in devotion with a pure heart - a leaf, a flower, fruit, or water - I accept with joy. - Bhagavad Gita

I gave my young nephew a book for Christmas. He's spent six months looking for where to put the batteries. - Milton Berle

A lovely thing about Christmas is that it's compulsory, like a thunderstorm, and we all go through it together. - Garrison Keillor

He that climbs the tall tree has won the right to the fruit; he that leaps the wide gulf should prevail in his suit. - Walter Scott

No matter what the recipe, any baker can do wonders in the kitchen with some good ingredients and an upbeat attitude. - Buddy Valastro

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
So just what are time flies, and why do they fly like an arrow? - Groucho Marx

I value my garden more for being full of blackbirds than of cherries, and very frankly give them fruit for their songs. - Joseph Addison

A fruit is a vegetable with looks and money. Plus, if you let fruit rot, it turns into wine; something Brussels Sprouts never do. - P.J. O'Rourke


Kids Meal

Stretch Exercises You Can Do At Your Desk

A Foot Of Sun

Sushi Spine

Police Targeting

Happy Bird's Eye UU

Moose Parking

Glassman

Paint Pants

World Cup Attention Getter

Fear Of Light

Bird Condo

Very Cold Beer

Seniors Bike Club

Watching The World Cup

Friendly BBQ Reminder

Geek Piano

Ugly Haircut

XL Safety Shoes

Dance With Me

Secret Exit

Drawing A Fine Line

Fastest Land Mammal

First Driving Lesson