Clint Eastwood

The vertizontal hold on the TV. - Archie Bunker

Television is democracy at its ugliest. - Paddy Chayefsky

A TV licence is a licence to print money. - Roy Thomson

It's the hottest thing on television. - Donald Trump

Television! Teacher, mother, secret lover! - Homer Simpson

In television blood is thicker than talent. - Gerald F Lieberman

Imitation is the sincerest form of television. - Fred Allen

Ah, TV respects me. It laughs with me, not at me! - Homer Simpson

When I was your age, television was called books. - William Goldman

Kids don't remember their best day of television. - Unknown

Nothing is really real unless it happens on television. - Daniel J. Boorstin

Sex on television can't hurt you - unless you fall off. - Unknown

Bed is like the womb, only drier and with better TV reception. - Linda Richman

Canadian cities looked the way American cities did on television. - William Gibson

When your wife asks what's on TV, dust is not the right answer. - Unknown

Entertainment is a thing of the past, today we've got television. - Archie Bunker

Television has brought back murder into the home... where it belongs. - Alfred Hitchcock

My children refuse to eat anything that hasn't danced on television. - Erma Bombeck

So long as there's a jingle in your head, television isn't free. - Jason Love

Celebrity was a long time in coming; it will go away. Everything goes away. - Carol Burnett

Jogging is for people who aren't intelligent enough to watch television. - Victoria Wood

Television: a medium. So called because it's neither rare nor well done. - Ernie Kovacs

Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. - Ann Landers

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets? - Dick Cavett

In California, they don't throw their garbage away - they make it into TV shows. - Woody Allen

If it weren't for electricity, we'd all be watching television by candlelight. - George Gobel

For those of you watching who do not have television sets, live commentary is on Radio 2. - David Coleman

The nice thing about being a celebrity is that if you bore people they think it's their fault. - Henry Kissinger

I don't think I'm a celebrity. I'm just a guy from east Texas who loves cars and airplanes. - Carroll Shelby

We owe a lot to Thomas Edison - if it wasn't for him, we'd be watching television by candlelight. - Milton Berle

Television remote controls encourage couch potatoes to exercise their options while broadening their base. - William Arthur Ward

When will I learn? The answers to life's problems aren't at the bottom of a bottle, they're on TV! - Homer Simpson

There is no way you can get people to believe you on screen if they know who you really are through television. - Jack Nicholson

The last fight was my fault though. My wife asked, "What's on the TV?"
I said, "Dust!" - Red Skelton

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx

It's not easy to juggle a pregnant wife and a troubled child, but somehow I managed to squeeze in eight hours of TV a day. - Homer Simpson

The perfect date for me would be staying at home, making a big picnic in bed, eating Wotsits and cookies while watching cable TV. - Kim Kardashian

I put my air conditioner in backwards. It got cold outside. The weatherman on TV was confused. "It was supposed to be hot today." - Steven Wright

One night I walked home very late and fell asleep in somebody's satellite dish. My dreams were showing up on TV's all over the world. - Steven Wright

I could never have imagined that firing 67 people on national television would actually make me more popular, especially with the younger generation. - Donald Trump