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Dog Training for Dummies

Reading between the lines comes easy for canines

Dog Training for Dummies thanks to Jim Serritella

QuotaBills
France is a dog-hole. - William Shakespeare

Let fightin' dogs lie - Archie Bunker

Never let the tail wag the dog. - Unknown

Dogs never bite me. Just humans. - Marilyn Monroe

The view only changes for the lead dog. - Norman O. Brown

Throw physic to the dogs; I'll none of it. - William Shakespeare

Panic plays no part in the training of a nurse. - Elizabeth Kenny

Flatterers looks like friends, as wolves like dogs. - George Chapman

Properly trained, a man can be dog's best friend. - Corey Ford

Be on your guard against a silent dog and still water. - Latin Proverb

The average dog is a nicer person than the average person. - Andy Rooney

When a man's best friend is his dog, that dog has a problem. - Edward Abbey

If dogs could talk, it would take a lot of fun out of owning one. - Andrew A. Rooney

No man should live where he can hear his neighbor's dog bark. - Nathaniel Macon

Old age means realizing you will never own all the dogs you wanted to. - Joe Gores

There's no psychiatrist in the world like a puppy licking your face. - Ben Williams

Any dictator would admire the uniformity and obedience of the U.S. media. - Noam Chomsky

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult. - Rita Rudner

The best training a top manager can be engaged in is management by example. - Carlos Ghosn

The trees in Siberia are miles apart - that's why the dogs are so fast. - Bob Hope

Skateboarding is training, but I don't think of it as training. It's fun. - Shaun White

It's not the size of the dog in the fight - it's the size of the fight in the dog. - Mark Twain

Justice is the insurance we have on our lives, and obedience is the premium we pay for it. - William Penn

Why do dogs always race to the door when the doorbell rings? It's hardly ever for them. - Harry Hill

Somewhere in the world someone is training when you are not. When you race him, he will win. - Tom Fleming

If you don't want your dog to have bad breath, do what I do: pour a little Lavoris in the toilet. - Jay Leno

It's tough to stay married. My wife kisses the dog on the lips, yet she won't drink from my glass! - Rodney Dangerfield

There are two things in this world that don't last long: dogs chasing cars, and pros putting for pars. - Lee Travino

I'm suspicious of people who don't like dogs, but I trust a dog when it doesn't like a person. - Unknown

When a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news. - John B. Bogart

Already, companies that speak in the language of the pitch, the dog-and-pony show, are no longer speaking to anyone. - Unknown

When your children are teenagers, it's important to have a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you. - Nora Ephron

Giving is more than a responsibility - it is a privilege; more than an act of obedience - it is evidence of our faith. - William A Ward

I'm planning to adopt a dog soon. It wasn't my first choice but my Doctor told me I can't have any biologically. - Bill Murray

If a dog jumps in your lap, it is because he is fond of you; but if a cat does the same thing, it is because your lap is warmer. - Alfred N Whitehead

My husband and I are either going to buy a dog or have a child. We can't decide whether to ruin our carpet or ruin our lives. - Rita Rudner

A doable goal for me is to finish a marathon under four hours. I'm doing all the training, but the hardest part is eating right. - Sean Astin

There's only one thing worse than training your staff and having them leave, and that's not training them and having them stay. - Zig Ziglar

The trout enjoys the river,
The whale enjoys the sea,
And dogs love most an old lamp-post,
But you're my cup of tea. - W H Auden

If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much. - Mark Twain


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