#1 humor site on the 'net

Drinking Friends

Creative solutions to today's water shortage

Drinking Friends thanks to Gwen Laxton

Home survival means going 'back' to the basics

QuotaBills
Always drink upstream from the herd. - Will Rogers

Life is too short to drink the house wine. - Helen Thomas

A friend in need is a friend to be avoided. - Lord Samuel

Silence is a true friend who never betrays. - Confucius

I seldom took a drink on the set before 9 a.m. - WC Fields

Silence is the true friend that never betrays. - Confucius

Shared joys make a friend, not shared sufferings. - Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche

Keep your friends close, but your enemies closer. - Michael Corleone

A friend is someone with whom you dare to be yourself. - Frank Crane

I believe in getting into hot water; it keeps you clean. - G K Chesterton

Talking with a friend is nothing else but thinking aloud. - Joseph Addison

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

He's the kind of man who picks his friends - to pieces. - Mae West

I ran a 100-mile marathon, and I was powered by coconut water. - Jesse Itzler

Nothing is there more friendly to a man than a friend in need. - Plautus

No one is completely unhappy at the failure of his best friend. - Groucho Marx

You can't drink all day if you don't start in the morning. - Founder's Breakfast Stout

Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into friend. - Martin Luther King Jr.

You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it. - WC Fields

I don't have a drinking problem. Except when I can't get a drink. - Tom Waits

What progress, you ask, have I made? I have begun to be a friend to myself. - Hecato

Friends, if we be honest with ourselves, we shall be honest with each other. - George Macdonald

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai. - Shirley MacLaine

Animals are such agreeable friends - they ask no questions, they pass no criticisms. - George Eliot

A bad cold wouldn't be so annoying if it weren't for the advice of our friends. - Kin Hubbard

I love to sing, and I love to drink scotch. Most people would rather hear me drink scotch. - George Burns

When tempted to fight fire with fire, remember that the Fire Department usually uses water. - Unknown

When a man who is drinking neat gin starts talking about his mother he is past all argument. - C.S. Forester

Yes, know thyself: in great concerns or small,
Be this thy care, for this, my friend, is all. - Juvenal

A wise man adapts himself to circumstances, as water shapes itself to the vessel that contains it. - Chinese Proverb

No guest is so welcome in a friend's house that he will not become a nuisance after three days. - Plautus

I figure if I have my health, can pay the rent and I have my friends, I call it "content." - Lauren Bacall

A true friend is the greatest of all blessings, and that which we take the least care of all to acquire. - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

Whenever a man's friends begin to compliment him about looking young, he may be sure they think he is getting old. - Washington Irving

I put contact lenses in my dog's eyes. They had little pictures of cats on them. Then I took one out and he ran around in circles. - Steven Wright

Drink and dance and laugh and lie,
Love, the reeling midnight through,
For tomorrow we shall die!
(But, alas, we never do.) - Dorothy Parker

Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born. - Anais Nin

Alcohol is not in my vodkabulary. However, I looked it up on whiskeypedia and learned if you drink too much of it, it's likely tequilya. - Unknown

If you go out looking for friends, you're going to find they are very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere. - Zig Ziglar

Advice from a tree:
- Stand tall and proud
- Go out on a limb
- Remember your roots
- Drink plenty of water
- Enjoy the view - Unknown


Truck Rest Stop

Romaine Empire

Hardworking Wife

What's That?

Long, Happy Marriage

Redneck iPad

Leonardo da Vinci's Unfinished Portrait

Microsoft Innovation

Mop Dog

Ventilated Bridge

Monkeying Around

Wing Support

Massage Therapist

Paper Wedding Dress

High Rise TV

Redneck Kickstand

Mary Potter

Jarred Cat

Frog Waltz

SinkHole Pickup

Always Use Your Mirrors

Johnny On The Pot's Plumber Truck

Wrench Wheel

Bonsai Fruit Tree